Like, did you always view yourself as a good communicator, or were there steps that you took to, like, practice and fine-tune the skill?

I thought I was a good communicator.

[laughs] I thought I had all these great skills, and I certainly had insight, and I was pretty centered.

Um, I c- I could, like, look inward when I, when there was a conflict, and I could sort of parse out what the issues were.

But I really didn't know how to name my feelings or my needs.

I did not know how to set boundaries.

I didn't even know really what, what all my needs and values were.

... working towards becoming the dolphin or something like that.

And the clients that you're seeing, what are the major differences that you're seeing in how they date from an emotional and a, a psychological point of view?

Well, again, I want to intro- I just want to interject for a minute on what you just shared about being late, and then I, then I'll address this.

Uh, 'cause that's a big pet peeve of mine as well.

And I believe, again, in stating your standards up front.

I have had that conversation on the phone.

"I am an on-time person.

How about you?" And I, I just want to know.

Is this something that you're hearing as well from the women that you're working with?

So Sandy, what inspired you to become a dating coach?

My divorce is probably my biggest inspiration.

I was married for 23 years to somebody where it was pretty lonely inside of that marriage.

And when I finally left, I decided to pursue a degree in coaching because I always loved helping people.

And I started out not with dating.

I started out helping people in midlife who were going through midlife transitions like empty nest or I want a new career and all of that.

And so I was helping men and women with this, do these amazing things.

How was she adjusting to all of that?

When did you start dating, and then when did you start the podcast?

So I waited about two years to start dating.

Everything was changing.

I bought a house.

I had no idea how to run a house.

I had to make sure that my kids were pretty stable.

There was a lot of conflict in our co-parenting, and so my focus was getting them to be okay.And so it took about two years till I established a business, till I got my kids settled, and yeah, the podcast started a few years later.

So but other than, you know, you obviously learned to not do that, but how did you approach what you were looking for in this season versus when you were in your 20s? Like, after divorce, like, are you, are you looking for remarriage? Are you looking for someone who, like, can get involved with your kids? Like, how does that change?