Mm.

What feels good about that? And for my example, for me, even though I was overstimulated with my son, one thing that I was doing when he was really little, I was saying yes to a lot of things.

Like, I would say yes to giving him chocolate before bed just because.

And I once was in Target with him and I bought him a $30 ride-on bumblebee just be- and I let him ride on it in the store just 'cause I was like, "That's cute and you're out of my hair." [laughs] And then I, my plan in my head the entire time was, "I am not buying this for you.

Like, no way" But then lo and behold, we get to the checkout line and I bought it for him, right? So I was just doing that, and it wasn't because I thought I was a bad mom if I didn't, it was purely because I wanted to avoid the meltdown.

And so even though I was overstimulated, even though I did not want to say yes, even though I did not want to be spending all this money and have my son eat chocolate right before bed, what was keeping me safe, what felt good, was not having the meltdown, was not having that discomfort within myself because my son would be crying about that.

And so, so many different examples, but just kind of pausing and asking yourself that question of what is keeping you safe from this? And o- oftentimes in a work-related setting, or even though you have a messy house and you say that you want to, to pick up, picking up all the time would mean that you would have you, in your head, once you start something, you can't stop.

Right