Mm-hmm.

You know? That like, well, I'm doing all these things, all the right things.

I'm working hard.

I'm getting all these degrees.

I'm changing people's lives.

I'm building a family.

And, and then one day it'll like knock on the door and, and present me a certificate or a life-size gold star or something.

[laughs]

awakenings.

The first was when I was working in the Middle East in that moment of or that chapter of high stakes frontline service work.

And it was incredible work, very life giving and impactful, life changing for myself, but also the refugee families we worked with.

And then at a certain point, my father was diagnosed with brain cancer and died, unfortunately, young in his early 50s.

And I chose not to go to his funeral in California.

I was too busy and too important and couldn't be away from the kids and the impact.

And that, you know, started raising some concerns in my own head.

What does that actually mean in practice?