But on an emotional level, I imagine it's very difficult to be in the room with that person after that fight

you're so right and in fact just going back to you know examples of um couples divorcing or even family rifts um I would say you can let that get in the way of being able to progress if you want to.

But there are many ways of choosing not to let it get in the way of continuing with the business.

And sometimes it will work and sometimes it will be a big challenge.

However, I would say that does go back to head, heart, briefcase.

Because one, from a heart standpoint, growth mindset, coachability, curiosity, and also being able to kind of separate out any of the emotional disappointments or emotional kind of toxicity of disagreements that may have occurred and really being able to kind of box that up and put that aside.

Sometimes when I have Coaching conversations where there's a lot of that friction going on in the organization, we have to figure out a way to really put that in a box and kind of set it aside for another conversation or for a different lane of figuring that challenge out.

Just a thought.

Right.

And so you're exactly right in what you observed in saying, "I'm not sure that's such a good idea," because it was opposing aspects of how they're wired for work, and it was not motivating.

It's not only not, not comfortable, but it's just not even motivating.

And so this is a classic sales model question.

And we l- I, I work with sales organizations all the time to really get the right people in the right roles.

Who are your new business hunters? Who are your client or customer success nurturers or, or, or account expanders? Who are the folks who are really good at any roles that require ongoing maintenance or, or even technical support? Really different shoes to walk in day after day, week after week, month after month.

And if we're, if we're, if we don't have kind of a language of how to understand that in action, we can miss some of the subtleties of how people actually get burned out.

... and the after.

accounting roots.

So in that work that I did, it was with organizations going through big transformations, technology transformations, but technology transformations are really about people transformations.

And so change management in that area was all about helping people understand how to reconnect with people Giving value, connecting to purpose, connecting to strategy in a way that was really redefining how they were going to use their skills, how they were going to use their styles, how they were going to use their relationships to help the organizations transform.

So there were a few different frameworks and models and things like that that I picked up along the way.

But then I am from Boston.

And Boston is a big hub for technology startups.

So I joined a technology startup.

How did that conversation even start? Yes, great question.

So can you give us an example of how the same recognition can motivate one employee and fall flat with another?

Yeah.

So this is one of the really interesting aspects of behavioral science in the, in how it im- impacts our work styles, and how we're actually wired to learn.

So when you think about how someone takes in information and has certain learning styles, there's a lot of, there's a lot of similarities to how someone takes in recognition and appreciation, and where and how it lands.

So behaviorally speaking, from a behavioral science standpoint, some folks really love to be recognized with more of a people lens, right? And they love to be up on the stage or be recognized, be on the top of a leaderboard.

But for some folks, that's absolutely not the way that they like to be recognized.

They would love to be recognized privately, just eye-to-eye contact, shaking a hand, quietly being, having their efforts reinforced and seen.

So how should a supervisor adjust their leadership style without making it look like favoritism?