Once a leader, or let's say someone in the HR department, a H-- an HR professional, has identified a high-conflict pattern, let's say there's a lot of complaining that, you know, s-something bad has happened, "I'm the victim once again," [chuckles] "It's someone else's fault," or whatever the pattern might be, what usually goes wrong next? Why do smart leaders get pulled into these conflicts?

I'd probably say a couple of things just to start off with.

For people listening, they might worry that, "Do I have to kind of diagnose this person as a high-conflict person and sort of fit them into a bunch of criteria?" No, we don't need to do that.

In fact, we would discourage you from tyin-trying to diagnose this person.

Instead, it really is looking at these behavioral patterns.

We can all get upset, and we can all sometimes act out at work, but then realize, "Okay, I sh- I shouldn't have done that." And sometimes situations can overwhelm average people, and sometimes for a long period of time, big organizational restructuring, "I'm worried about losing my job," or other big changes at work, or life events outside work.

All of those things can cause us to show up differently or in problematic ways.

So what do you see in the workplace? Do you see other ways this is applied, other co-problems it causes?