And then on the follow-up for that, how do these systems improve when somebody finally has experiences of safety, belonging, connection, purpose, and meaning?

Yes, so we started talking about something called threat physiology.

but there's different physiologies of what's happening in the body.

And there's essentially two states.

We're oversimplifying, but just go with it.

There's safety physiology and there's threat physiology.

And safety physiology is where our body says, hey, we can rest, we can sleep, we can digest our food, we can reproduce, we can do certain types of healing.

So there's lots of

Mm-hmm.

So if we're focused on the unwanted behavior, which is the strategy to try and help us, and we may not be able to understand how it's helping us.

If we just try to get rid of that behavior, then we're almost being violent towards ourselves.

'Cause we're basically saying, the way you're soothing or coping, we're gonna take that away and basically say, "Good luck." So, so when I am looking at the behavior that's unwanted, uh, I want to look at it a little bit broader than that.

I wanna see the needs that you're trying to meet with that behavior, not try to extinguish the behavior.

Although one day you eventually trip.

Yes.

Exactly.

It's the exact same thing that you're talking about, it sounds like.

Yes.

And gut health, I love working with people around gut health issues, 'cause they're trying to find maybe there's some other allergy, maybe there's some other food intolerance, maybe there's some sensitivity, maybe there's some missing magical supplement that if I just get that right combination, my...

Oh, if I mix this food with that food, I get problems, or there's fermenting, or there's, you know.

There's all these, "Oh, maybe it's some kind of candida or something." And it just starts to get to this point where you're grasping and, and grasping at straws.

And what I find is that it's not about the food.

There's a, there's a certain amount of that's about the food.

Mm.

You will have to tend to them for the rest of your life.

And the joy and well-being comes from tending to them.

Being able to connect with these different pillars, like connecting with your children.

It's a wonderful thing.

And you've got to check in all the time.

And how are they doing? And what needs your attention? There's no destination.

not evaluate what happened.

So in the medical world, for example, I might do an evaluation.