For everyone who lost Patrick, he is still young, still funny, still the kid who called his big sister when something went wrong.

I remember one time he was playing with matches, and his mattress caught on fire.

And he just yelled my name, "Laurie." And I came running in to his room, and I took that mattress, and I dragged it out the front yard.

And then I hosed it down, but we still called the police.

So he w- I, he, I was always the one that he would call to be taken care of 'cause I was r- you know, I was reliable, and we were close.

He trusted me, and I trusted him.

For his family, Patrick's absence has been part of every year since 1987.

I guess if I were to be completely in touch with my emotions, that I'm really angry that he wasn't here, that he hasn't been here these 39 years, that he hasn't been here as a family member, as a loved one, as a support system, as a confidant, as a comrade, as someone who could have been there for my wedding and the birth of my children and, and all of life's milestones, the Christmases, the Thanksgivings, you know? All the things that we all thought we'd be doing together, and Patrick was missing from those.