What are the warning signs? Okay.

So, okay.

With depression, you will have, you know, low mood states or low energy, things that previously you enjoyed, you no longer enjoy.

Some of the classic symptoms of depression, you would sit, you'd have sleep difficulties, but everyone's having sleep.

Certainly, you know, both parents are having sleep difficulties after a baby's born because the baby has, you know, regular feedings.

And again, it's a really difficult time emotionally and physically.

That aside, there is a separate phenomenon in some women whereby their mood state may worsen significantly.

you bring up a good point i think that is definitely one of the reasons that people won't reach out oh if i say what i'm feeling that i want to kill my baby i am going to lose my children and someone like lindsay clancy who had three children and then the fourth seemed to really push her over the edge according to some of her journals what what do you want to say just even a little bit more here about the help that's available and that it's not only necessary and this is an emergency but you don't have to worry about losing your kids.

IT'S, FROM A PSYCHOLOGICAL PERSPECTIVE, For the children, if the father is somewhat of a good dad, I guess, obviously not abusive or that kind of thing, but even if the relationship with the parents is so fractured, is it generally a good idea to keep the father in the children's lives regardless of how the relationship is with the mother?

So that's a really great question, Kara.

That's outside the purview of this book, but it's inside the purview of what I've done politically for over three decades.

And I almost always, again, given extreme situations, given significant abuse or neglect or substance use, it is always in the child's best interest to have a relationship with both parents.

Now, sometimes you have parent A say, well, parent B is a lousy person and they cheated on me and they did X and Y and Z.

And all those things might be true.

But if they are willing to be emotionally, physically invested in the life of their child, it is best to support that relationship.

Does this book or any of the science show, depending on the gender of the kids, what happens with mental health? And is that true, that sometimes the same sex has more conflict for a period of time?

What are HSAs and what are some of the benefits to having one?

The HSA stands for health savings account, and these are accounts that are paired with high deductible healthcare coverage, and you get the coverage and it has maybe a $5,000 or $10,000 deductible.

That's pretty high, but at the same time, either you or your employer, or both of you can put in several thousand dollars into the account that either can be used for health expenses like co-pays or you can save it if you can afford to pay your costs through out-of-pocket or if you're healthy, and that money can stay in the account for decades.

It can grow and it- you can withdraw it later on to pay expenses you incurred years earlier.

So it's a really special tax advantaged savings account for healthcare expenses.

Okay.

These are kind of like IRAs, you know, it's yours and yours alone.

And so one of the changes would allow spouses to make catch-up contributions.

So what are some of the ways that the IRS knows that you cheated?

Under the law, people who make payments to individuals very often have to also tell the IRS about those payments.

Think about your W-2 form.

It has what your employer pays you, it has a lot of other information, and the IRS gets something like 250 million of those a year.

That's a good place for it to start.

But beyond that, there are all these 1099 forms.

Did you get money from a brokerage account, dividends, interest, capital gains? Did you have gambling winnings? Did you get unemployment benefits? All these things are reported to the IRS as well as to you, and so the IRS has wonderful computers that can match these up and they send you a letter and say, "What about that money? (laughs) What about those gambling winnings that we didn't hear about from you?" And the other thing is that perhaps you didn't file at all.

How does the IRS penalize unpaid taxes?

What kinds of tax surprises tend to hit young investors?

For all investors, taxes are a really major element of rate of return.

And rate of return is how you know if you have a good, or a great, or a bad, or a miserable investment.

Taxes can eat away your rate of return.

And if you have any energy for learning about taxes, see how they affect your investments and your retirement saving.

Like, should I have a traditional IRA or a Roth IRA? And should I change that if I already have one? Should I get the other later on? So it's really important to know about taxes and investments.

Now, what happened in the pandemic is that all these traders were keeping a running total of wins and losses in their head, but they forgot that some gains are taxed at much higher rates than other gains.

How do you build good tax habits early?

So why is it so hard to file taxes in the US?

There are a lot of reasons for that.

One is that taxes are complicated because life is complicated.

For example, there's very generous tax credit for children.

It's $2,000 a year.

So what if you have an eight-year-old who lives with you? She's your niece or your grandchild, and she's with you for nine months of the year during school.

Do you get the credit or would somebody else get the credit? Next, there's human nature.

What kind of deductions do I qualify for? How can I reduce my tax bill?" Of the three, ChatGPT was the most detailed.

What did you find?

I had concerns.

I still have concerns, but I s- decided on balance that it was worth doing.

And since then, we've found out that a lot of high-ups at the IRS have done it as well.

The IRS is encouraging everybody to get IP PINs.

And that's just a PIN number that you have and you file it with your taxes, and the computer won't accept the return unless it has the PIN number on it.

So if the scammer tries to file a fake return in your name, he won't have it and it'll get rejected.

What's the process of getting one? Like, how hard is it?

And what influences why someone would choose 401(k) over an IRA?

It's often eligibility. Now, if your employer offers a match with a 401(k) and you have access to the 401(k) and the match, that would be a slam dunk. On the other hand, if you're an 18-year-old kid and you've got your first summer job as a lifeguard and maybe you have a great-grandparent who wants to match your savings, you would put it into an IRA. With traditional accounts, the money goes in pre-tax, so you get a really nice, sometimes very fat tax deduction for putting that money in, and the money grows tax-free. But on the other end, when it comes out, it's all ordinary income. It will be taxed at the same rate as your wages, and you have to start taking it out when you're 73. Now, with Roth IRAs and 401(k)s, the money goes in after tax dollars. You pay tax on the front end, and that's a little more painful because you don't get the nice deduction. On the other hand, it grows tax-free and then it can come out tax-free.

What's the penalty for withdrawing early if you have to, or you choose to?

If the money comes out of a traditional account, you will owe tax on it in general. Also, if you're under 59 and a half, you probably will owe a 10% penalty, but not always, so it's important to check on that and strategize. With Roths, it's somewhat different, and I would say look up the rules. But the most important thing to know, and especially for young people, is that if you pull out Roth contributions at any time, you don't owe tax or penalty on them. The only downside is that you can't put them back. But let's g- have an example of this. Maybe there's a young person who's managed to put money into a Roth every year and by age 30, she has built up $50,000, $60,000 in her Roth IRA of contributions. Now, there are also earnings, but they're not as much as the contributions. If she wants to take that money out, say, to go back to school or put a down payment on a house, that can just come out with no problem. So a Roth IRA can make a great emergency savings account for true emergencies or long-term investments and things like that.