So what's the difference? How do you view competing?

Well, yeah, and I kind of go back to it.

I talk about this in my first book, but just like the origins of the word compete.

You go back to Latin, it actually meant to strive together, fly together for excellence, right? You're almost in some pursuit of something.

And, you know, so we go back to what really meant to compete.

It was...

Not about, it was competing with, it wasn't competing against someone.

And I love it because I think it's so much more attainable and so much more... achievable you know it's what is it another quote wouldn't write the smallest good deed is better than the greatest intentions like i have these big intentions to go to this you know have this uh big event but this you know you can actually make an impact but what i think the challenge i would find and maybe i imagine players would find is there's people i'm more easily drawn to and those are the ones that i continue to have these hqcs with how do you make sure that you're spreading the connections

important to you

about winning? And the athlete will often be like, well, it's knowing that I pushed myself, you know, like that I went out there and I pushed myself and accomplished something.

And I say, well, what's the most important part? What's the most important part of that for you that, you know, knowing that you pushed yourself to be the best you can be? And they'll say, well, you know, ever since I was a kid, like I just, I've had this dream, right? I've had this goal that I want to work towards.

And so it's just been all about achieving that goal.

And, you know, so...

In that, I ask these probing questions.

I always say, well, what's most important to you as a person? I think about the type of teammate or person you want to be.

Could you talk about some practices for building awareness?

what are some things that maybe you could give some pointers, some things you might commonly see that things they might, we might mess up on as coaches with a youth team when we do appoint captains or what's one thing that we should be intentional about to guiding our captains?

Yeah.

I mean, I think when you look at the age, there's a lot of different approaches people can take.

Some people like to rotate captains.

You're a captain for a week or a captain for the practice.

You're a captain for the day, you know, but like so often, like that's just like, okay, you're going to speak in the huddle, you know, like, Like it's just so ill-equipped.

So I struggle at the youth level on having a real clear solution.

What is mental fitness? What does that look like for, say, a 12-year-old baseball player? And what is the 80-20 or what's the few key things they could work on when it comes to mental fitness?

What was that process like? Is it, you know, you're having a conversation with them, what kind of questions are you asking? How are you intentionally looking for the answers to be able to write this book?

Yeah, like interview would be a probably not the best word for actually what those conversations look like.

We have some self-reflection, because everything comes down to figuring out, first off, what is their level of awareness? So let's just say, you know, selflessness or, you know, mental fitness or, you know, hard conversation, like giving feedback, like any of those three concepts, right? I can say, okay, this is what it looks like exceptionally, and this is what it looks like, you know, like on a one-on-one.

So we get players to reflect on their behaviors in that tool or concept and say, okay, where do you see yourself? And then it's like whether they rate themselves at a five out of 10, eight out of 10, it's going, okay, what are we gonna do to move the needle there? So you start to get them to reflect on what it would look like to be better in that area.

And then we start to unpack the beliefs that actually keep them from taking that selflessness and being that, you know, 10 out of 10 selfless player, or being 10 out of 10 and having the hard conversations, or celebrate their teammates, whatever these types of leadership behavior, um, concepts are.

So we're really getting them...

This all starts with awareness and saying, okay, this is where I am, this is where I wanna go, and this is what is getting in the way of me closing the gap from where I am to where I wanna be.

Or our coaching values.

What role do parents play in supporting team culture? When like, sometimes their involvement can be even harmful sometimes.

Well, you see them being negative in a large area that affects an athlete's ability to be aware.

So this is oftentimes what I call the bridge between level one and level two.

It's awareness, right? And so in level two, one of the first things I talk about in leading yourself is just taking responsibility, right? And awareness is something I talk about in level one, which is this ability to know when I'm really above or below the line.

Above the line, I'm open, curious, committed to learning.

I'm below the line, I'm closed, off, I'm defensive, I'm committed to being right.

When we're above the line and below the line, which I do that for all the different qualities like responsibility and competing and different aspects of leadership.

The greatest culture captain that you've studied, what can we learn from that person?

[laughs]

So this book is for coaches, and, and when coaches read it, they're gonna love it, right? Um, you know, but there is four, four levels that we discussed.

There's level one, know yourself.

You know, level two, lead yourself.

Level three, lead others.

You know, and level four is lead the team.

A- and they're, they're...

Um, can you just tell us, I guess, more from your side of things first, like how you got s- wh- where that comes from as, as the essence and, and then what that kind of includes in the know yourself part?

I thought it was soccer.

Yeah, well, I mean, there probably has more leanings towards soccer, but I try to keep it open because I want athletes and coaches who read it to be able to see themselves in there, you know, and there is a bit more talk that would revolve around soccer, field hockey or lacrosse, some sort of that type of sport.

But it's definitely an outdoor sport.

There's no doubt about that.

But yeah, I always I just avoided just like naming the sport because I wanted any athlete to see themselves.

in that character of Lily or a character of Pete and be able to resonate with something that they were going through because the story of that fable is actually based upon the story of a lot of athletes that I had been fortunate to coach through the last few years and record transcripts on and take those coaching conversations and the challenges they went through and present them into a fable.

The interesting thing is we talk a lot about with athletes, back to your question, why we start with know yourself.

What could I do? or what could our listeners do if they have a practice tonight when they're listening to this the next night, this week, that would begin to develop leadership without having to sit the kids down in a meeting or a presentation or a classroom session, JP?

what about you

it's kind of well i think it's actually cool because you mentioned your daughter coming and visiting too and it's almost 10 years ago since i actually first spoke with you and so that's what makes this podcast episode really special for me because you may not remember it but i was like getting going on this journey i was gonna say oh i'll start a podcast i want to help coaches build their culture.

It would help coaches be better, better coaches.

And I reached out to you and you were really gracious with your time.

And you said, you know, absolutely.

There's a need in this space and you encouraged me and you encouraged me to stick with it.

You said it'd be a hard road and, but just give it a couple of years.

What should we do? Like, what's your advice?