So what specific questions, like how would you ask that? Like what questions do you recommend that we

ask? So the first and foremost, when you're first delivering the process, if they haven't been involved in building the process, I would start with an accusations audit.

So our accusations audit are like, what are the negative thoughts in that person's head? Oh, you're probably just another consultant.

So I would start with an accusations audit, which would be, you probably think I'm another consultant walking in telling you how to do your job.

And in their head, you've now taken that off.

So you are a thread as a consultant walking in, telling them how to do a process.

Now, there are a series of things that they're thinking about.

How do you apply it when you want to sell a service? Give us some examples of that, some scenarios.

So knowing that's giving you a real edge, what do, what do you do personally to get yourself into that state before a sensitive conversation? Because this has officially become, like, a language that you are completely fluent in.

Yeah, so I, I meditate.

You know? Like, I'll meditate before I have a meeting.

I, and I wanna be in flow state.

I don't want to be, like, before we get on this call, I don't wanna be, like, reviewing every single one of the questions you're gonna ask me.

I wanna have reviewed them yesterday so when I showed up today, I had walked the dog before I showed up to talk to you [laughs] and, uh, we could just have an easy conversation.

And then we, we literally have a skill, uh, called CAVIAR.

But what changes if you're across the table from somebody who's toxic or somebody who genuinely intimidates you?

Um, so it's the way you approach the whole thing?

It's 100%.

It's what we call staying curious, or what my, my mantra is staying curious.

And then beyond that, we, we use a, a technique called tactical empathy.

So when we say tactical empathy, empathy, by our definition, is about them, not about us.

Sympathy is about us.

Empathy is about them.

Give me an example.

If you were to coach both sides, from what you know about this negotiation, what should be the mindset going in? 'Cause nothing was really accomplished in the first round.

So the mindset, and mindset is key to negotiation.

Mindset is, "How can I walk in and be open-minded and actually hear what the other party has to say?" So it goes back to, are you listening to what the other party is saying? And, and, and ideally, can you listen in what we call level five, listening for their point of view? What is their world view?

Give me an example.

So an example is I fly into Vegas the other day early.

It's, like, ten o'clock.

I know that I'm not supposed to check in until three o'clock.

They may or may not have a room for me.