Did you trip and fall? [laughs]

Uh, almost.

Uh, I got arrested.

Uh, [laughs] and, um, after I got released the next morning, because I'm not an important criminal, I'm just a very, very garden variety drunk, um, I went to my parents' house.

And when they came home, my mom and dad did this horrible thing called, like, giving me a choice.

Uh, and the choice was go to rehab or get out.

And so I went to rehab, and I hated rehab so much because everybody there had al- like, they'd been there for, like, two, three days, so they were all friends, and I didn't fit in.

Mm-hmm