You probably loved that the, the local boy was coming back.

back.Here's how deep the roots go for me.

Um, you mentioned Marino, so I'll tell you a quick anecdote about that.

My old man, uh, was on the medical staff.

He wasn't the proper, uh, you know, the, the orthopedist or anything, so it wasn't as though he had to check out injured knees and such, but, you know, general practitioner for Pitt football.

And so we would go in August up to Edinboro when they had their summer camp in advance of the season.

And one, one season in f- in front of, uh, Marino's senior year, one of the trainers came up to him, and I would go up to camp for a few days with him every, uh, every August, and one of the, uh, trainers came up to the old man and said, "Hey doc, you mind checking on Marino's roommate up in the dorm room? He isn't feeling well with whatever." And so he did, and, uh, [knocking] knock on the door like, uh, "Uh, just a second, doc, just a second." I mean, it's a dorm room.

I mean, I know what I've seen, but I'm curious kind of what jumps out to you the most.

Give me Aronde Gadson as a sleeper tight end this season and as long as Njoku and Kohler are out

outWe can agree on the Gadson family because Ronde Senior, of course, toiled at Pitt before his son went off to play for the 'Cuse.

Um, Matthew Berry, first of all, great thanks.

Because I asked you a week ago DK Metcalf or Jaylen Waddle.

You said Waddle, and Waddle definitely was great.

DK Metcalf was an atrocity.

Yes

... and the Bills.

[upbeat music]

All right.

Thank you to our announcer, Amin El Hassan.

Great stuff.

Yes, it is time for Mr. Lister.

I'm going to give you a category, and two foes will compete naming one by one names on that list until one competitor cannot summon a name on that list.

Today playing, let's go with Mike Ryan.

"On a mountain high"

[laughs]

Explain to me.

I'm not, I'm not from your neck of the woods.

What, what, what in hell? What is the tradition? What is the, what is the custom down there? You understand, same thing as your favorite, uh, college football collective, the Hurricanes.

You understand hurricanes are a disaster that attacks you, right? You get that, right? Same thing as a cyclone.

I guess there aren't cyclones properly in, uh, in Florida, but still, you know hurricanes are bad and they happen to you, and your team is named after that.

The U is named after the thing that attacks you.

Huh?

Yeah, is my take.

I'll say this, Matthew Berry, just to provide, uh, the other side.

I think that if I ha- uh, well, I'll forecast that, uh, by the end of it, Rico will get more touches, um, than Warren will by season's end.

And I agree with you about the potential of that defense, even n- if J- uh, uh, Joey Porter Jr. never puts the uniform on.

It could be a top five defense.

That means a lot of running the ball to spin the clock in the second half, and I think that favors Dowdle over Warren-

[upbeat music]

I have a question for the rooms, directed though, uh, primarily at Tony.

[laughs] What you, what do you call him?

Trista, how are you? How's everybody over there? You know what? ACC kind of weekend coming up here.

Yes, pro football is, uh... 'Cause I wonder how the Dolphins fans watch a game like the division rival, if you call them a rival, the Buffalo Bills housing another powerhouse pro football team.

Does that matter to you? Are you sort of thinking like, "Oh man, now we're, now we're down a game and a half in the standings," or is it like, [laughs] "Of course we're not in contention"? Meantime, you got the Canes la- laying like, uh, three touchdowns against the Wake today, and the biggest game maybe on the slate this side of Ole Miss LSU this weekend is Louisville and SMU, two traditional ACC powerhouses.

I can't wait for the football weekend.

He was catching tutties and everything, and I'm like, "Okay." Like, yes, they didn't win the game, but they didn't get blown out the way they should've.

Well, I, I, I thought that, I, I mean, you know, Dan brought this up earlier in this week, and it's one of my favorite things, is circumstantial, um, hyperbole, which is whatever game we're watching is the g- i- it features the greatest collection of talent, uh, mankind has ever seen, until next week when we'll repeat that this is the best quarterback in the league.

And as the game was winding down, Goff throws that meaningless touchdown pass to, to, um, to St.

Sucks.

"What the hell? Was it worth it?" And again, it goes back to Netflix and all the trappings around it rather than the, than the, the quality of the games.

But I think if you're the Rams, you sort of have to convince yourself that that was the reason you got hammered the way you did, right? Um, because what a gut punch otherwise.

The thing about the travel, uh, to the Down Under and jet lag and all of that, and it feels like, well, that would be real, but also I think the average person like me is thinking about like, "If I did that, oh, I'd be so tired the next day," but we'd be in coach.

Don't...

Th- th- this is an NFL team.

I'm sure not only are they in the lap of luxury, I bet they have those like, you know, those, those, uh, aliens, like you see in Aliens, those tubes that they sleep in on their way.

Hard times, Addy

Yeah.

Like, all...

But I don't mean for a few days.

It went on for, as I say, a month.

So you would turn on the TV, and it would be the news anchor just talking about updates from what's going on at, at Ground Zero.

But on that morning, obviously we're three hours behind where you guys were, so we're just waking up, and everybody's making phone calls trying to connect this.

And it was, you know, when you see, when they recall what happened, the, the, the two planes and then the collapse, and then the collapse.

Can you think of a, a, a, an, a bigger disparity where the collegiate team is so great and the pro team is so terrible?

Like, NFL players have always had curfew, and the other sports, nah, just go be an adult.

I- it, it is funny how much things have changed.

There are guys getting kicked o-...

Like, legit good players getting kicked off of big-time college football programs that, if you would compare it to, like, the early Hurricane teams of the early '90s-

It's not just Barstool.

Stu Goss? No, I have, I've only seen...

I'm telling you what I saw, but obviously there's more platforms.

But I saw that Barstool was weighing an offer, and I had heard that Stu had made an offer, or would make an offer, did make an offer.

I appreciate you.

Now, I was, um, I was at, uh, Jimmy Kimmel's watching football, and Jon Hamm is a regular at the... was a regular at these, uh, gatherings watching football.

There's name drop number two.

And I was in the midst of conversing with him.

[upbeat music] There we go.

I was in the midst of talking to Jon Hamm, regular guy wearing his St. Louis Blues, his tattered old ball cap, and over his shoulder appeared a glow in the archway of the door.

It was Tom Cruise in a black peacoat over a black turtleneck standing in the door.

Yeah.

You, you can't do that.

I love the bookmakers at [laughs]...

It's 54.

How much do, how much do you think they're gonna win by? Like, 54? I'm, eh, I don't know, fif- 55? Let's find the middle.

No, the, the hook.

54.5.

There it is.

It is very weird when you reach a financial level that you c-

If the Clippers can just take a propaganda arm that is the worldwide leader in sports, and have them run their Pulitzer Prize winning reporters out there to just have a story that the NBA then says is wrong, like, what do you make of all of those conflicts?

You, you said that the ESPN reporters were uninformed.

I think, I, I don't kn- I, I'm not going to assume that this is what you're getting at, but it seems willfully uninformed, right? They are, and, you know, it's not a big conspiracy theory to suggest that they now are in league with the league, and so are dis-incented from damaging the league.

And I really do think that this is all leads to what, and this isn't an indictment of the world in which Pat McAfee wants to live, but what he gets at is, like, "Dude, why are we talking about all the negative stuff? Sports are here to, to, to boost our spirits and make us feel good and happy.

Why do we have to know about all the ugliness?" And basically, what that amounts to doing is washing away the last half century of sports journalism, right? I mean, it's like, let's just ignore the ugly stuff and focus in on the good times of sport.

The guns

... running towards me.

Right.

Mm.

And, uh, Dan, you go first.

Who do you think that is? It, it's a turquoise background, a, a crowd cheering, and a lone basketball player gesturing in some way to the crowd.

It's a blue uniform.

And so how do you approach an important division game that is gonna be in a place that is so foreign and a place that is gonna require 15 plus hours of travel? That to me is intriguing.

What do you make of, you know, professionally it's great to be making the trip over there to watch this game, but where do you come down as a fan as much as you can be in your spot on week one having divisional match-ups that are gonna be critical at the end of the year to seeing who's in the postseason? I can't stand them.

We've been out in the desert without football for six months.

Just give me a cracker.

This is why you try it out without a football

You lost to a, a ham and egger.

And th- this is the, this is the danger of shooting your mouth off.

Writing checks that, uh, your butt can't cash.

You understand?

This is about allegations of not disclosing to the federal government what they were legally obligated to.

Back to school means my boys are back to making their lunches every morning.

And I like knowing they're reaching for Boar's Head.

Ooh.

Maybe it'll be the Packers, but I think it's going to be the Detroit Lions.

And I talked to, uh, our mutual pal Mina Kimes about this.

She kinda sort of agreed at least about this.

First of all, talk about robbing Peter to pay Paul.

That's what the Bears did in the division.

You know, they took away Ben Johnson, who I had long, and a lot of other people agreed with me, maybe he was the straw stirring that drink in Detroit.

Mm

All right, you're up with pick number three, Sheck.

All right, do I stay in the NFC West? I'm tempted to do that.

Or do I go, since I just took the Vikings, does that mean robbing Peter to pay Paul? Let's do it.

Detroit Lions.

Under 10 and a half.

Somebody has to come in last place in this division.

Maybe it'll be the Packers, but I think it's going to be the Detroit Lions.

So, you know, we need, we need the healthcare to be even worse, you know, to just start taking out all these Raiders and Cowboys fans.

We'll get you one tomorrow, and you'll have it on air, and you'll judge.

What goes on? I, I don't wanna...

I don't think Cheetos deserves to claim both the puffy thing and then also the crunchier, bumpier, thinner thing.

Well, choose one or the other.

Which are you, Cheeto, right?

You're against options?

I like options.

I don't like Cheeto trying to corner the market by saying, "We're everything.

And I have even had the shocking take that has received no real pushback, that that's the best team Miami has ever lost to in a national championship game, easily.

Hmm.

I, I mean, yeah, it's hard to get in the way back machine.

1987, the Fiesta against Penn State and Bama and all of that.

Against Gene Stallings.

Yeah, I mean, the, uh, it's, it's, I think, literally accurate to say that what the Hoosiers did, Brandon Walker, whoever else, say, figured out this era.

Impossible not 20 years ago.

It's very difficult for Miami to come up with the kind of money that Indiana has.

Black

Well, even the ones that are quarterbacks.

I do remember saying, and I think he said this in public spaces, so I don't feel like I'm betraying anything to say, Deion Sanders is, again, I believe on the record about Cam Newton, saying he is not a, he doesn't, he's not a CEO, and that's what you have to be as the quarterback of a team.

Deion Sanders, prime time, you think that Cam Newton, uh, dresses too silly and is too bombast? You're saying that prime time? He's saying, "Yeah, I was a cornerback.

I was a kick returner.

I was an entertainer." You can't be like that if you're the quarterback of a team.

I suspect that television executives have that sort of, um, outmoded probably, outmoded type of philosophy.

You do understand how it happens, though, right? That the league and its executives want to put as voices and faces on the days that you're watching the most sponsored and lucrative thing that there is in sports, how the, the, the Black people are largely the ones playing it, and the white people are the largely the ones critiquing it and examining it.

You can't have both with a veteran quarterback.

First of all, yeah, I think that I, I'm with ultimately what Mike is saying.

You think that Cam Ward is going to have a good career.

And I think that you i- here in Dolphins country see the product of the difference that the NFL environment can make.

Malik Willis is where he is because of the time he had up in Green Bay.

I do not think he would've necessarily turned into the appealing, to the enticing option that he was this off season were it not for his time up there in Green Bay.

I think about it also as you Miami Hurricanes fans have now seen this string of guys go Cam Ward, and Carson Beck was good, and I think Mensah really has a great shot at the Heisman.

Just say it.

Did you have some of your, uh, disgusting clam pizza when you got here?

I flew in.

It, it...

You know what? It put a nice exclamation point on an otherwise dreadful journey over here.

Thank you for asking, Dan.

On the flight, first of all, it started out well enough, because I had the whole row to myself, and literally half the flight I'm by myself in, in, in the lap of luxury, because no one's in my lap.

I can s- Do you put your feet up and do the thing? I didn't do that.

Wouldn't we head toward a day where whether it's a YouTuber or a newspaper guy or a radio guy or anybody else, if the team's offended by it, if the networks and the streamers are no longer interested in journalism because ESPN isn't interested anymore in journalism and they lead the way on the standard, then why wouldn't, uh, teams do something like this more often? Like, why wouldn't they just start banning people whose behavior is just objectionable to them?

Mm-hmm.

And so I started sort of doing that, but the show wasn't really about anything.

It was me doing the same thing, just talking, but at the same time every week.

And then at some point, I talked about another video, and people responded to it.

And I'm the kind of entertainer that if the audience responds, I'll do that.

Even if it's, like, the worst-

Mm-hmm.

And he was the opposite of this.

Go ahead.

Well, for the last month, uh, anybody who's been paying attention, it's not just important for the players to get right in time for the NFL regular season.

It's important that the fans are on the ball, too.

So we've been running our own little fan training camp with a number of drills here today.

Like you say, we're gonna see how familiar self-identifying football fans, um, how strong they are at identifying some of the football figures that we're about to watch every Sunday and Thursday and Monday and beyond.

Let's get going here.

And the first one is to Tony, who is a regular now on Football America, weighing in there and making the show better.

You've never seen that play?

I, I don't know what the reason is, but Tua has been a player who, despite playing for a team that has not done anything, and, and Tua being a player who has not done any winning, everyone has had an opinion about him, Dave, for his entire career so far.

Yeah.

I- in, uh, if you blur your eyes and in broad strokes, you know, the, the notion of we like to build people up and then knock them down, and then turn them into a punchline and all of that, and especially when they're multimillionaires, um, that's part of it.

But I, I, I do...

I, I...

You know, whether or not he's gonna play well against the Dolphins is neither here nor there, in my opinion.

What I think is striking is what you saw last night, that Mike McDaniel coaching with Justin Herbert, who, I don't know if you heard, the Dolphins could have had, um, the, that he looks like the real deal, and Mike McDaniel is gonna elevate to another level with, um, with a, an actual franchise QB versus what Tua proved to be for you guys.

How is it anything like that?

I feel like for Pittsburgh, for one of the, one of the things they have to do, Shaq, to get out of the, uh, cul-de-sac of elite mediocrity is get to Drew Aller or whoever the hell you want on that depth chart as soon as possible and let Mike McCarthy, uh, get some work with him and, and try to put this organization in, um, a spot where you could actually look at them as like, "Oh, this is kind of an interesting thing going on right now." But we're, we're still, we're still kind of caught in this place right now where until Rodgers goes away, you can't really do anything, I feel like, to progress as a team.

I just think, you know, the Browns plan, and we made fun of it a year ago, and now we really, really make fun of it, but at least they made an effort.

They're...

Now, the specific choices they made maybe weren't great, but they flooded the zone a year ago.

They already had Watson, obviously, and then they draft Gabriel and Shador and they bring in Flacco.

That's trying to solve the position that matters most in the quarterback league, whereas the Steelers were not taking swings.

They feel like they're gonna luck...

What do you disagree with?