Right.

Like the arrogance in that response, Stephan.

Unbelievable.

Wow.

I think now that it's out in public, Don is out calling on my family members.

I'm out to dinner with friends because we had friends who came in from out of town.

I don't know this is going on.

What is it like to sit through all of that? And know that you're holding the secret and you're not able to, you're not at a place where you can share that secret with your parents.

You know, I don't know that when you go to a doctor for anxiety, they go, well, did you get abused, you know, in any way? They should, because we know that C-PTSD is when something is occurring over and over and over.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I mean- I mean, starting at age seven, after my first assault, the nightmares started and they were reoccurring nightmares.

I had them pretty much all my life.

I went, I didn't start seeing a therapist until college.

I was 22 years old and it was actually a PTSD moment that I had had with my girlfriends where I was on a dance floor and In D.C., you know, and you're out with your five girlfriends.

So you're speaking on stages and who are, what kind of places and people are you speaking to on stages?

So once that came out, like after you had the girlfriends, how did that come out to your family and how did they respond? How did your parents respond?

So.

This next piece is a doozy.

I kept it in a box for many, many, many years because I vowed my parents were never to know.

So my parents never did know.

My mom passed away in 2021.

And three months later, one of my brothers who abused me, he and I got in a argument, a text argument.

I just want to check out like, how did they support you though? In the end, like are through this, I should say.

Walked in those shoes and no one, and I am pretty sure she would attest that no one should have to go through that.

No, and I thought I was all alone.

I thought I was the only one that this happened to up until two years ago.

And I don't want a single young girl or young boy or even adults like us to ever think that they are alone again.

And on my website, I have a whole section called Resources.

I have songs that helped me through my journey.

I have SSTA organizations.

I think the more I believe the more you share your story, and the more you talk about it, the more cathartic it will be for you.

Yeah.

Yeah, I mean, I had the PTSD episode with my daughter.

I had another PTSD episode with my husband.

I mean, everything around me, I felt like I was walking on shards of glass.

And I just couldn't get back up.

And every time I got back up, I was using survival mechanisms.

And so...

Yeah.

To go through all of that after something so bad, and you've been shamed the whole time through it, you don't know what is okay and what isn't anymore.

No, no.

And I gotta tell you, my marriage was on the rocks in 2022 because I would never give in.

I lived my trauma as a little girl.

Now I'm going through a trial, living my trauma all over again.

And now that I've been able to write it down and let it all go, I'm happily married to my second husband [laughs] and we've got a great relationship.

And even my kids are like, "Mom, you're so different than you used to be." There was an example where, my three kids are from my first husband, and divorced parents, you'll s- sometimes get in an argument.

But now on this other side of healed, what's it been like for you to be remarried, be in this relationship as the different version of you?