And I'm really curious about What have you learned about those couples when they kind of first come together and kind of what predicts, what signs predict things are going to go well and things are going to go kind of get into trouble, should we say, for them?

It's interesting with this because I would have to say in all the years that I've worked with couples and people in general, that they always surprise you.

it's such an unpredictable space it really is and this is why I suppose when you enter the world of relationship you have to really make sure you've done the work on yourself you continue to do the work on yourself because apart like I mean not to put people for like relationships but I mean a partner who could present in such an open way kind loving uh very much by your side could also make a decision that completely surprises you, throws you off, and you decide that you have to end the relationship.

I think with Married at First Sight, when we work with the couples, Usually, even if the relationship doesn't work out, usually it kind of ends in a better way.

They can communicate well if they're quite emotionally intelligent, right? Where there's empathy in a space, compassion, they can see another person's point of view, etc.

It probably doesn't go so well if there's a lot of blame in the space, if they just can't acknowledge their role in something, particularly if they're not open to feedback.

You know, I think...

What's underpinning this? And also what you see is what can shift this for people, like this desire, this willingness to lean into therapy.

So Charlene, what is the best way to speak to your partner about this if you're feeling in this way, if you're feeling that something's hurting or not right?

Yeah so it's really essential to speak to them before you start to feel and experience the pain because what can often happen, sorry what I mean by that is often what I find is that women will speak to their partners when they're in pain and they're kind of feeling really emotional about it.

Yeah so during sex they're feeling a bit emotional about it or they're feeling really angry or resentful.

But I think ideally if you can speak to your partner sort of before you're actually having a sexual experience that they really are aware of what they need to do or not do to ensure that you have the best possible sexual experience.

So it might be that for a period of time you sort of move away from kind of like penetrative sex.

You know there's lots of different ways to enjoy sexual pleasure.

You know you can kind of explore different ways of being sexual but it's so important to make sure your partner is a part of this process as well.

What happens to those people?

think it's definitely diversified it.

And I often hear, for example, couples saying that, you know, when I first met my partner, we had sex in this way.

And I really want to kind of get back to that.

But, you know, I suppose the question that I would then ask is, but what if there's like a different experience that I could say to you that, you know, may also be exciting and pleasurable and fun.

And I think often when I say that, you know, people then realise actually there's more out there, you know.

I always sort of liken it to like a kind of, I don't know, roses tin or quality streets, kind of tin of lots of chocolates, lots of different colours.

Yeah.

Right, right.