If you go look at yourself in the mirror and ask yourself, am I in a conscious relationship? I think a lot of people would maybe say no.

Right.

I think most people would say no. Yeah.

Most people, because unless you've really, really, really done the inner work.

And then by the way, it also requires that your partner is doing that.

And if they don't, then you can also, so the fear underneath all connection is how much tension, how much distance can happen between the two of us without me losing you.

And so then I might decide that I want to be on a path to heal myself or to look inside and become more conscious of my own patterns or differentiate whatever, um, you know, ways that I might even inside partnership.

And so one of the things I want to talk about as well today is like, what does it look like, you know, as an effort match? Like, how does someone see that in their relationship? Like when someone's showing up exactly the same way as you are?

So what is your multidimensional approach? Like if somebody wants to work with you, how do you, what does that look like?

Well, I mean, it's so psycho individual for every single person.

There is no one size fits all.

It really is meeting with an individual and then seeing where they are.

And to me, I can work with anyone about any topic.

It doesn't really matter what it is, but is your orientation really kind of self-focused, meaning we're not externally organizing and we're learning to turn that orientation inward, which is, again, the radical responsibility and acceptance of what is so that we can take full accountability and then move outward.

And so some people, before they can even start doing work, they need to do nervous system regulation.

Do you have any, like, I always ask my guests towards the end, if you have any like tidbit, nugget of wisdom, any little thing that you'd like to leave our listeners with?

But since you, you do see a lot of folks at that level, I'm, I'm wondering, do you know a lot of people who are at that success level and have made that type of difference and are also have it all figured out, so to speak?

Yeah.

Great question.

W- so I'll do my best to answer it, but I love the pushback and the challenge.

That's what makes a good conversation.

So I'm grateful for your question.

I think of it...

So you've got a quote here that says, "You can't outthink your trauma." Paul Smith.