Like there is a good ending for yourself, you know? Yeah.

Right.

Well, because the book has just helped so many people and it's been really awesome.

I asked myself, what do I want to do next? Right.

Because I didn't want it just to be a book you just read and then sat down and forgot about.

Like I wanted it to really like highlight the words and like take it into your own life and disrupt what you need to disrupt in order to have peace and defined it.

And you can have those boundaries.

it's so sad it's like what the is wrong with people I know

I'm sure.

Yeah.

Yeah, I went, I wanted to throw like one last huge chance of, of reconciliation with my dad and, you know, I wanted us to have that relationship 'cause there's no daughter in this world that doesn't want that with their father.

Um, for, with a, with a healthy person.

And so I begged him and begged him and, uh, he went, and we were there for like five hours, like such a long time.

And I just told him everything I felt and I really just expressed my inner deep like longings for a relationship and for us to be close, and how I, I needed, you know, just, I, I needed truth but I also needed kindness and I needed him to change some things.

And there was a whole, there was all kinds of stuff that I talked about.

I mean, how is she doing?

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Even though I was not in a divorce situation, I felt like I had to have, like, daily funerals in my mind of the people that I was grieving, and I was grieving a family that I thought I had and I didn't, and the relationships and all of that.

And so, and with my dad.

That's the hardest.

Yeah.

So I went over there.

And a lot of the kids were in the house, and they, you know, "Hi, Amy." They come running out and, you know, all the things.

And I hugged the girls and all the things.

Like, what, what can you share about maybe those toxic cycles and how you were able to overcome them?

Um, I think for me, you know, I rely heavily on my faith, and I believe that, like, God is not the author of confusion.

And I, I believe when there's chaos, when there's tension, when there's lies, when there's cover-ups, when no one can really speak truth, um, that's a huge red flag that something is off.

And I, I believe that you have to just trust your basic instincts, you know? I feel like your body will tell you when something is off, you know? You get that, like, hunch of, like, mm, something feels off, you know? And, um, and so for me, I've just had to, like, work through a lot.

I've had to forgive people that's never asked for forgiveness.

Um, I've had to just have boundaries and learn, you know, the importance of it in order to keep, you know, my mental health do- [laughs] you know, I'm okay-

Okay.

But in my heart of hearts, I kinda knew that something was off.

And from the Midwest always?

Just...

Yes, always.

Always, you know, Arkansas raised and born and, you know, that kind of thing.

Um, they all...

Well, I guess those two, m- my great-grandpa had a huge drinking problem.

He was a huge alcoholic.

I don't like the way that they operate in their own family.