But I'd love to hear your take on what are we missing about brave spaces? It's great to have them, But what's the other part that we have to recognize when we are focused on developing these brave spaces?

So first, I want to acknowledge the value of even creating paradigms like safe space and brave space.

Recognize that even the intention around it and to you.

create and coin this new space was super innovative.

And it was two professors, Dr. Brian Orrell and his fellow professor who was a part of this.

So amazing to think, hey, we actually need to shift the norms and agreement we have in this room to be able to talk about something that could activate people or to get to the crux of something that we can't get to unless people feel that they can speak And share.

And they were so they said, hey, we're going to have to invite a space where people can make mistakes and be vulnerable.

From a coaching perspective, What advice could you give us to understand how to better set up these safe, brave spaces, how to best address psychological safety? What steps would you give a people leader on how to rethink safety? This approach.

Tell me more about that.

Absolutely.

As you know, the first chapter of the book is focused on BS, and those are usually the things that get in the way of us being true to ourselves and in alignment.

There are things that also get in the way of a client or us being able to name truly what our top two values are, because we can be very performative.

What is it that my family or community of origin expects of me? And so now I'm gonna say faith and family, 'cause folks love to say the things that, oh, I'm supposed to say, or they actually haven't done the work to be introspective to understand what is it that, that, what is it that's most important to Dave? What impact would it have, and what are the behaviors when I'm doing it? Why is it important versus, oh yeah, because, yeah, of course it's family.

Isn't that what everybody says is family? My family's so important to me versus recognizing the threads, or it requires us to be much more introspective.

To get there, we have to get all these other presuppositions out of the way, right, so that I can truly answer what is it that's important to Aiko, and Aiko, you don't have to think about what your family would say you should do or your community.

Hmm.

have.

And a book on self-leadership gives you permission to bring it back in in terms of maybe you're not at every march, maybe you're not consuming everything about X, Y, and Z, but who do I want to be? We know that the one thing you can control is yourself.

The one thing that you can influence is yourself.

And this book highlights the many ways that we give up that agency.

And we don't even know it because we have this other operating system in us that has brought in all these other programs and beliefs of doing things that we never chose.

And therefore, we keep living in a certain way that is not serving us.

And this book is about self-leadership.

This is

I'm having, I'm having a hard time.

So I just wanna say, as much as we talk about AI and how fast things go, and the p- complexity, and it's so complicated, blah, blah, blah, the thing that is the hardest is managing this machine here.

And I would rather jump into a system and be like, "We gotta do this, this, this.

It'll be done yesterday," than manage the most complicated system we have on Earth.

But we wanna talk about AI and all these other things, but we don't wanna learn how to manage and embody ourselves.

And most of us live from here to here, and if we actually had to be in our bodies all the time, how different would the world be? But we would be dealing with something that's so much more complex than AI and the strategy, and strategy, it's culture, right.

We-- It would be so much more complicated, and we're more willing to do that externally than managing this here, which is what we are accountable for.

... really connected to what you're saying right now.

It tears so much the state

...

in order to refute this bullshit belief that's in our system.

So I wanna make sure people understand bullshit asymmetry principle is what made me name this.

But some of the things, these derailleurs that keep us from being our core self and aligned with our values, people pleasing, our ego, narratives from family and community of origin- Misuse of power, either power being used over us in an oppressive way, or us using power over other people for whatever reason.

So the list goes on and on.

But we have to be aware of those so that when you ask me as my coach, Julie, and you say, "What are your top two values?" I don't just fly out and say, "Faith and family," 'cause that's what-

It's the last thing we do.

... addressing some of these conversations we've had early in the podcast.As like a high-level TLDR, like, a overview of that framework, could you break down for our audience, like, the anchored, aligned, uh, accountable? Like, how would they tactically go about using that to transcend bullshit?

Sure.

Um, one, I will say that the framework really is about self-leadership, and the answers and the path to be able to follow the framework is really about your own self-awareness.

So if we started with anchored first, it's about being anchored into your values.

And for values, we really are talking about we want you to identify your top two.

We want you to not only say, "Oh, one of my values is, um, being honest." We want you to break it down into what are the behaviors, because there's a difference.

If I say being honest, I might say telling people the truth no matter what.

Mm-hmm.

Yeah

... she was talking about Audre Lorde and Bell Hooks and all these folks as if they were just, you know, everybody in this room should know these people.

And I thought, "I know them, and I love them," but was there some pre-work? I didn't think anyone else knew, knew these names.

And she was incredibly receptive when I asked questions that were maybe prov- brought some friction 'cause I really wanted to understand the work at different levels.

And she was so open and curious about it and not defensive at all.

And when we...

She wanted to meet during the break, and when we met, she asked me what I thought about the training.

So what does it really mean to be anchored?

Like, how did you, like, how did Anchored, Aligned, and Accountable like pop into your brain? Like, when did you come up with the framework? And tell us more about how it works.

Sure.

I would say that in coaching clients, it's sometimes hard for them to see what is it that they really want or why something troubling them.

And time and time again, it came up.

It came down to them wanting to know, OK, what's the who's the person I really want to be? And not in terms of cosplay of roles, et cetera, but how do I want to feel at the end of the day? Or by the time they're seeking a coach, there's some type of friction or tension that's happening.

And what I often saw was that who they wanted to be, there was such a gap between who they wanted to be and who they were showing up being every day.

And most of us spend most of our time working and in the workplace.

like bold bullshit as a category?