Why You Don't Have to Love Being a Stepmom All the Time

Now, I don't know if you can relate.

I feel like you can, but my first couple of years as a stepmom were pretty hard.

They got a little Western at times.

We had a lot of chaos.

We had a ton of conflict.

My husband and his ex have a very high conflict relationship.

And at times, it really felt like the chaos and the conflict were never going to stop.

And I remember during those first couple of years as a stepmom, having moments when I absolutely dreaded custody leaks.

Transition day felt like it was this slow buildup to a ticking time bomb, and I could feel the anxiety getting worse and worse with every breath I took.

I don't mean every transition day, and I don't mean every custody week, but it definitely happened.

And I say all this, I really liked my stepkids.

It wasn't that I didn't like them.

It wasn't that I didn't want to be around them.

It was, you know, and you know that there are days where stepmom life is great.

and especially when you do like your stepkids, when you love them.

But some days you don't want to hear anything else about the custody schedule.

You do not want another text coming in from the ex changing plans you had.

You do not want to clean up after kids you didn't raise or have the same conversation with your partner for the fifth time.

Maybe you just don't even want your stepkids around that day.

That's the first feeling that we're talking about today.

Then after that feeling, When you can admit that you're having those thoughts to yourself comes the second feeling.

I'll talk about that too.

That is the one where you think to yourself, what kind of person even thinks that way? You feel guilty for the way that you're feeling.

Now, I spent 23 years on and around Capitol Hill.

I sat through a lot of hearings and I have never seen members of Congress go after a witness the way that a stepmom goes after herself at 10 o'clock at night when she's lying in bed.