The PAUSE Podcast - Sanctuary for the Wild Ones
Oct 9, 2026 · 30 min · 11 segments
Choreographer, author, and movement analyst Alexandra Beller joins The PAUSE for a conversation about intuition, surrender, and the body’s memory. She recounts learning the dances of her young…
Alexandra BellerGuestAri ClibeHost
Like, what situation is that where I feel like s- no one is asking anything of me? That doesn't feel [laughs] familiar.
And I'm listening, and I'm able to put down any of the things that I might be listening for.
I mean, listening for, for me, feels like it's got an agenda from me attached to it.
I'm listening for something as opposed to just being with you and listening.
What if you were in a forest? What wants to come through, might be another way of putting it.
I w- I wanna, I wanna make meaning out of things, and I think there's a certain kind of, like, grounding and safety I get when I start to see a pattern that ma- feels meaningful to me.
I feel like something like what I, I suspect religion gives people, a certain sense of like, "Oh, that's why." I don't know if it's that's why I'm here.
But just to be able to say, "Oh, that's why," feels relieving to me in a, in a life where I have not adopted religion, and I don't feel like I really have any knowledge or story about why I'm here or what will happen when I'm not, um, or why I am with these people or in this particular life or have happened, you know, into this particular flow.
I don't feel like I have any real story about that or sense of a system that I believe in.
So there is a kinda existential, like, unmoored-ness that I feel in general, and these little bits of meaning, for me, feel tethering or mooring in a positive way, in a like relieving way, solidifying way.
I think that art-making for me was often that place of trying to make meaning out of just a, a overwhelming sense of not knowing.
And I think I really appreciate the sensation of not knowing in so many situations, and it's also can be overwhelming, feel overwhelming to me.
Like, what situation is that where I feel like s- no one is asking anything of me? That doesn't feel [laughs] familiar.
And I'm listening, and I'm able to put down any of the things that I might be listening for.
I mean, listening for, for me, feels like it's got an agenda from me attached to it.
I'm listening for something as opposed to just being with you and listening.
What if you were in a forest? What wants to come through, might be another way of putting it.
I w- I wanna, I wanna make meaning out of things, and I think there's a certain kind of, like, grounding and safety I get when I start to see a pattern that ma- feels meaningful to me.
I feel like something like what I, I suspect religion gives people, a certain sense of like, "Oh, that's why." I don't know if it's that's why I'm here.
But just to be able to say, "Oh, that's why," feels relieving to me in a, in a life where I have not adopted religion, and I don't feel like I really have any knowledge or story about why I'm here or what will happen when I'm not, um, or why I am with these people or in this particular life or have happened, you know, into this particular flow.
I don't feel like I have any real story about that or sense of a system that I believe in.
So there is a kinda existential, like, unmoored-ness that I feel in general, and these little bits of meaning, for me, feel tethering or mooring in a positive way, in a like relieving way, solidifying way.
I think that art-making for me was often that place of trying to make meaning out of just a, a overwhelming sense of not knowing.
And I think I really appreciate the sensation of not knowing in so many situations, and it's also can be overwhelming, feel overwhelming to me.
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