The Hint Hive: Amplifying Women's Voices
Aug 14, 2026 · 20 min · 11 segments
Send us Fan Mail We love telling girls to be strong, confident, resilient, independent, and capable. But what if we're asking the wrong question?…
Kelly HintHost
So what does strong girl even mean? I absolutely love seeing girls encouraged to be confident.

I love seeing girls in sports, girls in STEM, girls leading classrooms, girls speaking up, girls climbing mountains, girls becoming CEOs.

But somewhere along the way, raising strong girls has become tangled up with something else entirely.

Instead of saying, let's eliminate sexism, we've started saying, let's make girls strong enough to handle sexism.

When children repeatedly receive messages that they must constantly adjust to unfair environments, they often develop what's called internalized responsibility.

They begin believing, if something is unfair, it must be my job to handle it better.

Psychologist Albert Bandura's social learning theory demonstrated that children model behaviors they observe in the adults around them.

They notice who gets interrupted, who apologizes most often, who performs invisible household labor, and who holds decision-making power.

If a girl constantly watches women cleaning up after everyone, apologizing unnecessarily, putting everyone else's needs first, avoiding conflict, accepting unequal treatment, those become normal.

So what does strong girl even mean? I absolutely love seeing girls encouraged to be confident.

I love seeing girls in sports, girls in STEM, girls leading classrooms, girls speaking up, girls climbing mountains, girls becoming CEOs.

But somewhere along the way, raising strong girls has become tangled up with something else entirely.

Instead of saying, let's eliminate sexism, we've started saying, let's make girls strong enough to handle sexism.

When children repeatedly receive messages that they must constantly adjust to unfair environments, they often develop what's called internalized responsibility.

They begin believing, if something is unfair, it must be my job to handle it better.

Psychologist Albert Bandura's social learning theory demonstrated that children model behaviors they observe in the adults around them.

They notice who gets interrupted, who apologizes most often, who performs invisible household labor, and who holds decision-making power.

If a girl constantly watches women cleaning up after everyone, apologizing unnecessarily, putting everyone else's needs first, avoiding conflict, accepting unequal treatment, those become normal.
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