Jul 18, 2026 · 23 min · 9 segments
Cappy reads an article about a miserable Baby Boomer spinster that is shocked being single, childless, and majoring in stupid shit has a cost later on in life.
Aaron ClareyHostI'm going to get back to that story, Sonny.
Just you listen to Boomer Great One.
He's going to tell you about how it was back in the olden days, back before fire.
Back when we walked uphill for everything.
In fact, we didn't even have a concept of downhill because there was no downhill.
Everything was uphill.
We thought that was normal.
We didn't even have a word for it because there was no alternative.
It was uphill all the time.
You just need to reach down and grab yourselves by your bootstraps and pull yourselves up, shunny.
Because when I was your age, I bought a house for $25,000.
And I made that money on my paper route and busing tables at the local cafe.
And if I could do it, you can do it too.
You just need to reach down and pull yourself up.
And just buckle up.
Buckle up there, buckaroo.
God, I hate boomers.
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