How To Say No To A Client Without Losing Them

Yeah.

But why does that backfire so badly? Like me giving in and saying yes, because it is a yes.

You think you're giving them what they want.

In the moment, it feels generous.

It feels like this relationship building move.

Yeah, and see, here's the part that's tough.

To us, it feels generous, but to them, it reads as fear.

And that's really the core of it.

A client can feel the difference between yes, because I'm choosing to, and yes, because I'm scared of what happens if I say no. You've heard me a dozen or more times talk about leaks on this podcast, right? Fear leaks in the exact same way.

When you cave that fast, they don't really register generosity.

They register that you needed the yes more than they did.

And the person who needs it more has the weaker hand.

Yeah, so the fast yes actually lowers my status with them.

Literally instantly, it lowers the status.

But it does something even worse over time.

It makes your yes worthless.

So let's think about it for a second.

If you say yes to everything, your yes carries no information.

It's not a gift.

It's a reflex.

So when you do deliver something great, they don't value it because you'd have said yes to anything.

The word yes only has the power if no is also on the table.

That's the agreement is free thing.

Yes.

And agreement is free and commitment costs.