Healing Your Identity

So to begin, we are going to see ourselves through the lens of those who we admired and looked up to As a child, this is sort of a rule of thumb, a golden rule of childhood.

We see ourselves through the eyes of those who are responsible for us.

Now, this can very well be our parents, but not necessarily could be relatives, could be siblings, older siblings.

It could be friends.

It could be teachers, you name it.

Ultimately, we are going to look up to these individuals, and when we do, we are looking at them to mirror, to attune, and essentially tell us who we are.

So if we're treated well, then ultimately we're going to see ourself as lovable, we're going to see ourself as worthy, and essentially we're going to get in touch with who we truly are because the mirroring and attunement from these individuals is going to be accurate based on who we truly are.

If we are treated poorly or in a way that is not accurate to who we are, we are going to have a distorted self-perception, self-image, and we're going to see ourselves through a negative and distorted idea, a negative self-image or self-concept.

Now, there are many different things that go into forming a self-identity.

It's not necessarily so simple.

It can also fluctuate based on a person's mood or a person's day experience, but ultimately includes our beliefs about ourselves, our habits, our roles that we were forced to play and survive within a family system, as well as our actual physical appearance, our body specifications.

Now, the most specific element of identity that I'm referring to here is the mental picture.

So the idea of yourself, how you see yourself, how you feel about yourself, and how you value yourself, what your value system with regards to yourself, what's your belief system regarding who you are.

Now, it is very well known that in life you get what you are.

This is a pretty popular saying.

I think most people hear it and know it.

But practically speaking, what this means is that the energy that you put out is exactly the kind of energy that you receive as within, so without.

So you can see that everyone around you, the universe is just reflecting back to you the energy you're putting out, whether you realize it or not, whether it's conscious or unconscious.

the energy that you put out is going to be based on a point of reference from who you for whom you believe you are and how you see yourself so what i mean by this to explain is who you believe you are becomes that point that you attract into your life or you repel right so who you are your identity is essentially not necessarily fixed it is something that you can create you can identify with something or you cannot identify with something but what you what you call me, or what you say I am, that essentially is your core identity, and that becomes the point of reference for everything that is attracted to you into your life.

So if you decide that the point of reference, the me, the I that you refer to when you say me, that essentially is going to be the point of attraction, of manifestation into your life.

Everything and anything that comes into your life is going to be based on that identity.

So if you decide and believe that and you see yourself or you feel about yourself as unworthy or worthless you don't have value for yourself or maybe you just don't know yourself or you avoid yourself completely that becomes your identity and sometimes it fluctuates so much based on circumstances if you're constantly shape-shifting so you may not necessarily have a fluid or one main point and therefore the energy that's going to come back that's going to be reflected is going to be chaotic it's going to be negative and ultimately it's probably going to be destructive or even or even narcissistic So who you decide to identify with, your identity, is essentially up to you to decide.

Now, in many ways, we were raised in environments where we were told who we were, we were forced to become people, different identities to survive, and we had to play different roles.

And maybe we started to believe things about ourself that are not necessarily accurate to who we are.

And because this identity is so powerful and so a primary focus and the vantage point for the rest of our lives, we begin to live the rest of our life out of this identity.