Marriage Rehab: Exposing Narcissistic & Emotional Abuse
May 27, 2026 · 39 min · 15 segments
What if your anxiety, confusion, hypervigilance, exhaustion, or emotional shutdown after betrayal is not weakness—but trauma? In this powerful episode of Marriage Rehab, Dr. David Hawkins and…
Katie WengerGuest
David HawkinsHost
To everyone, I hope that it is helpful and validating to know what you're experiencing in terms of what you're feeling and thinking in reaction to, you know, a type of betrayal.
What betrayal trauma is, is it's your body and mind reacting to not being safe.
You're not emotionally safe, and you, y- your body and mind react in that way because they're trying to protect you.
there is someone, especially someone very close to you, that there's some type of betrayal that breaks your trust in that person, in your environment, in your situation, then you are going to react.
You're gonna feel differently than you typically do, and it's going to impact that relationship and probably others as well.
If someone's body reacts, if they get triggered, we use that word triggered a lot, can that be a hopeful sign? Sort of, in other words, alerting them that something is going on?
Yes, certainly, because you're reacting in the way that your body was designed to react.
Without that alert, it would, you would not be, your body would not be functioning as it was designed to do.
So it is important, and I think it really does help your perspective to know when things like that come up with your body tightens.
If you feel anxious or alert to your surroundings or more reactive or, you know, sometimes people have a stomach ache or a headache or more fatigued.
All those are parts of your body and mind alerting you that something is off and that you should be looking for what's off in your surroundings, right? So that you can fix it or protect yourself, certainly.
So, so you've already named some of the things, uh, that happens, but tell us a little bit more about what you see with someone in that moment.
What, what are you typically seeing when you're sitting with a person, r- they're telling their story, and you see something, and you, the betrayal trauma specialist, what, what, what says to you, "Hmm.
To everyone, I hope that it is helpful and validating to know what you're experiencing in terms of what you're feeling and thinking in reaction to, you know, a type of betrayal.
What betrayal trauma is, is it's your body and mind reacting to not being safe.
You're not emotionally safe, and you, y- your body and mind react in that way because they're trying to protect you.
there is someone, especially someone very close to you, that there's some type of betrayal that breaks your trust in that person, in your environment, in your situation, then you are going to react.
You're gonna feel differently than you typically do, and it's going to impact that relationship and probably others as well.
If someone's body reacts, if they get triggered, we use that word triggered a lot, can that be a hopeful sign? Sort of, in other words, alerting them that something is going on?
Yes, certainly, because you're reacting in the way that your body was designed to react.
Without that alert, it would, you would not be, your body would not be functioning as it was designed to do.
So it is important, and I think it really does help your perspective to know when things like that come up with your body tightens.
If you feel anxious or alert to your surroundings or more reactive or, you know, sometimes people have a stomach ache or a headache or more fatigued.
All those are parts of your body and mind alerting you that something is off and that you should be looking for what's off in your surroundings, right? So that you can fix it or protect yourself, certainly.
So, so you've already named some of the things, uh, that happens, but tell us a little bit more about what you see with someone in that moment.
What, what are you typically seeing when you're sitting with a person, r- they're telling their story, and you see something, and you, the betrayal trauma specialist, what, what, what says to you, "Hmm.
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