Learning To Pick Your Battles | Selena Winbush

This podcast I was listening to, the guy said that kids today distrust first, and then it takes time for them to trust later, where you and I, maybe during our time, we would trust adults automatically because we were told to do that.

Mm-hmm.

And then if they broke our trust, okay, I kind of went into this place of everybody will trust me here from the beginning.

And when I didn't, when I felt or saw the opposite of that, it pushed me in a good direction.

to be a little bit more empathetic, to give more space and time.

So going back to those three things, confidence in each other, in a style of play, whatever comes from time, trust, and then he said freedom, giving them the freedom to fail and do things.

And I think like a parent, sometimes as coaches, we can try to just scoop them up and keep them from failing

I think you got to love them enough, like Don Staley said, to let them fail.

Yeah.

I think that's one thing that's missing these days.

Like our parents, like if we had a consequence, we had a consequence.

Now parents will try to save them.

You know, we try to save them just because you don't want them to suffer the consequence that you know is going to come.

But there's no teacher like a consequence, you know? And so.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Loving them enough to let them fail and figure it out, I think is important too.

So it was nothing wrong with that, you know?

Yeah, that's a good point.

The last one you talked about was flexibility.

And I think if I was to choose one thing that as you kind of go, a coach goes through their journey from being young and wanting to be in charge and control everything to to then letting some of those things go.

The more flexible you become, the more that, not living the gray, you still gotta have standards, but you don't have to have an opinion on everything.

That's huge, and I wonder how long it takes for that to happen.

And I think that's hard because It doesn't matter what it is.

Like my assistants can do something.

This podcast I was listening to, the guy said that kids today distrust first, and then it takes time for them to trust later, where you and I, maybe during our time, we would trust adults automatically because we were told to do that.

Mm-hmm.

And then if they broke our trust, okay, I kind of went into this place of everybody will trust me here from the beginning.

And when I didn't, when I felt or saw the opposite of that, it pushed me in a good direction.

to be a little bit more empathetic, to give more space and time.

So going back to those three things, confidence in each other, in a style of play, whatever comes from time, trust, and then he said freedom, giving them the freedom to fail and do things.

And I think like a parent, sometimes as coaches, we can try to just scoop them up and keep them from failing

I think you got to love them enough, like Don Staley said, to let them fail.

Yeah.

I think that's one thing that's missing these days.

Like our parents, like if we had a consequence, we had a consequence.

Now parents will try to save them.

You know, we try to save them just because you don't want them to suffer the consequence that you know is going to come.

But there's no teacher like a consequence, you know? And so.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Loving them enough to let them fail and figure it out, I think is important too.

So it was nothing wrong with that, you know?

Yeah, that's a good point.

The last one you talked about was flexibility.

And I think if I was to choose one thing that as you kind of go, a coach goes through their journey from being young and wanting to be in charge and control everything to to then letting some of those things go.

The more flexible you become, the more that, not living the gray, you still gotta have standards, but you don't have to have an opinion on everything.

That's huge, and I wonder how long it takes for that to happen.

And I think that's hard because It doesn't matter what it is.

Like my assistants can do something.