Paul Avery: Smelling The Rain Again
Oct 10, 2026 · 43 min · 12 segments
Stopping the drinking does not stop the pain. It just means you finally have to feel it. In this episode of Internal Momentum, Ben sits down with Paul Avery to unpack what it takes to start living…
Stopping the drinking does not stop the pain. It just means you finally have to feel it. In this episode of Internal Momentum, Ben sits down with Paul Avery to unpack what it takes to start living again while you are still in the middle of healing. Paul is not a coach or an expert with a framework to sell. He is someone doing the work in real time, and willing to talk about it honestly. Paul shares how twenty years of trauma, alcohol, drugs, and isolation left him so shut down that two years ago he could barely hold a conversation. He opens up about the masks he learned to wear as a kid, the shame of believing he was the only one who had been through what he had, and why keeping it all to himself was the biggest mistake he ever made. He talks about what changed when he finally told his family the truth, why his daughter became his rock, and the small moments that told him something was shifting, like stepping outside in the rain and smelling it for the first time in as long as he can remember. Ben and Paul explore why numbing the bad also numbs the good, and why the hard feelings have to come up before the joy can come back. They talk about the difference between having thoughts and being your thoughts, the mirror between how we see other people and how we see ourselves, and the shame that grows around the things nobody talks about. Ben shares his own versions too, from food and keeping himself relentlessly busy to the private habits he spent years believing made him the only weird one. They also explore the idea that it is not the event that traumatises you, but the story you tell yourself about it. And why the experience Paul kept hidden for so long may now be the thing that gives him purpose: being living proof, for someone still in the thick of it, that recovery is possible and that nobody has to do it alone. If you have ever kept something to yourself because you were sure you were the only one, this episode will remind you that you are not, and that it is never too late to start talking. About the Guest Paul Avery is rebuilding his life after long-term trauma, addiction, and years of isolation, and is sharing his story from the middle of his recovery rather than the other side of it. He speaks openly in the hope that it reaches someone going through the same thing. His interests include AI, music, and supporting other people on the recovery journey. Connect with Paul: Instagram: @paul6087555 Chapters: 00:43 Rebuilding Life After Trauma 01:01 Rebuilding Life After Trauma 06:17 The Journey Through Addiction 09:41 Opening Up and Seeking Help 14:11 The Power of Presence and Awareness 20:12 Exploring the Depths of Dreams and Subconscious Thoughts 22:32 The Journey of Recovery and Self-Discovery 23:15 The Importance of Seeking Help and Connection 27:00 Breaking the Silence: The Power of Sharing Experiences 30:02 Reframing Trauma: The Stories We Tell Ourselves 33:41 Finding Purpose Through Pain and Experience 38:15 Collaboration and Community: The Path Forward
Stopping the drinking does not stop the pain. It just means you finally have to feel it. In this episode of Internal Momentum, Ben sits down with Paul Avery to unpack what it takes to start living…