How To Destroy A Spiritual Direction Relationship

So I know many of you want to do that.

They want to destroy the relationship.

Yeah, many of them want to.

And so we're going to explain.

This is a how-to show.

How to wreck your spiritual

relationship.

This is a DIY

on how to wreck your relationship with your spiritual

director.

Right.

So in spiritual direction, there are boundaries, right? There have to be good boundaries.

I was once tempted to...

the idea of a good friend of ours who said this and i disagree and and i disagree in terms of what i wrote in navigating the interior life which is my book about spiritual direction i agree with what i wrote and i disagree with where i was heading because of some recent experiences in spiritual direction And what I wrote in Navigating the Interior Life is that a spiritual direction can't be, I believe this, and I'm open to you arguing, by the way, but this is where my head is.

You can't direct a friend.

And the reason I believe you can't direct a friend is because once you move from director to friend, let's say it naturally emerges in spiritual direction, now you're no longer moving from someone who has the ability to be objective with a directee someone who's perceived by the directee as someone who's objective separated prayerfully assessing listening to the lord about you and so then you move into instead of the directee uh being someone who the director I'm not an egalitarian when it comes to spiritual direction.

That's baloney.

I'm not a Rosarian.

I don't believe, if the director doesn't know more than the directee, they shouldn't be directing the person.

They have to have more spiritual experience, more theological experience, that sort of thing.

When those boundaries are crossed, the directee perceives themselves in a way that they're that they begin to exit out of a listening docile stand disposition to a equal arguing discussing disposition how's that for a setup

it's great it's great yeah no i actually i i completely agree with you um I don't know how it is with guys in spiritual direction, the bro mode, how often that comes into play and seeing each other as just kind of hanging out, talking about holy things.

I think with women, it's a particular problem.

It's more, it's more frequent with women.

I think so.