AVOID TRIGGERS

But I want to talk about avoiding triggers today.

Whether you're doing dangler or the losing and winning strategies or any other tool I've given you, know that you will need to ask yourself some hard questions when you start to feel yourself out of control.

Start to feel here is what's important.

You need to Take a minute and just sit with what's happening inside of you or outside of you, around you.

If your emotions and behaviors are already out of control, it's really, it's not too late.

But it just requires more effort to remember and use your skills.

Triggers can pop up all over the place and leave you feeling helpless.

So be prepared.

Ask yourself these important questions.

Am I in denial about something? Am I angry? Am I talking negatively to myself or others? Am I manipulating, gaslighting, or lying? Is my ego larger than life now? Or am I rationalizing the truth? Am I in any middle circle behaviors right now? Am I in danger of being in halt? hungry, angry, lonely, or tired.

That's an acronym that's used in the 12-step programs.

Any of these would be stressors, and they can set you up for a slip or relapse.

You've worked way too hard to lose your sobriety.

It's worth the effort to slow yourself down, take a deep breath, and do a self-assessment.

Just notice in yourself if there are any particulars that go on while there's a trigger that's happening.

This could be an emotional trigger, a physical, a spiritual, but just slow yourself down, break it up into, well, here's another acronym I'll throw at you, P.I.S.E. Is it physical, intimately? That's in terms of knowing yourself or knowing someone else.

E, emotionally, S, spiritually.

You might want to just note that acronym and write down any triggers that you know show up for you in these ways.

And how do they show up? Like, has there been something that just happened, someone that you just talked to or ran into? Is it physical? Is it like gut feel, tingling in your throat? feeling a heaviness in your arms or choking in your throat.

And it's different for all of us, but pay attention to what that might be for you.

Really important to know yourself and understand how these start to develop and take on a life If you can pinpoint, you know, oh, every time I get that sort of start coughing or get that choking in my throat, this is usually the startup of a trigger or me shutting down or getting hyperactive or hypoactive, which would be the shutdown.

And this is usually where I might could run into some middle circle behaviors.

Any people, plays, things, events that trigger something that might lead to inner circle, which is what we would call your acting out behaviors.

So don't bring any defensive strategies with you, right? Just leave them behind you.

It's liberating to recognize the good work that you're doing and empowering when you can self-correct.