Why You Keep Spending When You Know You Shouldn’t | BPD & Impulsive Spending

**Why can spending money feel like emotional relief when you have BPD?** You feel empty, lonely, rejected, angry or overwhelmed. Then you see something you want. And that little voice says, "Buy it!" In this episode, I explore the complicated relationship between **BPD, impulsive spending, emotional regulation and shame**. I look at why spending can become a way of escaping emotional pain, filling chronic emptiness, extending a good mood or even trying to buy a different version of yourself. This episode is about understanding *why* the spending happens and what we can actually do about it. 🌱 Have questions, stories, or something you’d like us to cover? We’d love to hear from you. Email us at **bpddiariespodcast@gmail.com** and let’s keep the conversation going. 🎧 Looking for meditations made for emotional regulation, BPD, and more? Check out  *Empowered Heroes Meditations*  on ⁠⁠⁠⁠Spotify. If you’d like more support in your journey toward BPD recovery, Steff offers 1:1 sessions using evidence-based tools from DBT, Schema Therapy, and Mindfulness to help you heal. Email for a **free 30-Minute Consultation**:  📩 steff@bpdsupport.org or check out the website: **www.bpdsupport.org** **Free financial support resources:** UK: StepChange Debt Charity - https://www.stepchange.org | National Debtline - nationaldebtline.org Ireland: MABS (Money Advice and Budgeting Service) - mabs.ie Australia: National Debt Helpline - ndh.org.au | 1800 007 007 US: National Foundation for Credit Counseling - nfcc.org | CFPB- consumerfinance.gov 📚 **Referenced Research Includes:** American Psychiatric Association. (2022). Diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders (5th ed., text rev.). https://doi.org/10.1176/appi.books.9780890425787 Carpenter, R. W., & Trull, T. J. (2013). Components of emotion dysregulation in borderline personality disorder: A review. *Current psychiatry reports*, *15*(1), 335. https://doi.org/10.1007/s11920-012-0335-2 Glenn, C. R., & Klonsky, E. D. (2009). Emotion dysregulation as a core feature of borderline personality disorder. *Journal of personality disorders*, *23*(1), 20-28. https://doi.org/10.1521/pedi.2009.23.1.20  Kujovic, M., Bahr, C., Riesbeck, M., Benz, D., Deiß, M., Margittai, Z., ... & Meisenzahl, E. (2025). Effects on impulsivity and delay discounting of intermittent theta burst stimulation add-on to dialectical behavioral therapy in borderline personality disorder: a randomized, sham-controlled pilot trial. *Borderline Personality Disorder and Emotion Dysregulation*, *12*(1), 2. https://doi.org/10.1186/s40479-025-00278-3  Lieberman, M., Eisenberger, N. I., & Crockett, M. J. (2007). *Putting feelings into words: affect labeling disrupts amygdala activity in response to affective stimuli. PsycholSci18 (5): 421–428*. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1467-9280.2007.01916.x  Ott, C. A., Voce, A., Grinband, J., Lopez-Castro, T., Fertuck, E. A., Stanley, D. A., & Lempert, K. M. (2025). The borderline personality disorder feature of identity instability predicts temporal discounting in a community sample: An exploratory study. *Personality Science*, *6*, 27000710251374485. https://doi.org/10.1177/27000710251374485  Sansone, R. A., & Wiederman, M. W. (2012). Spending too much: Relationships with borderline personality symptomatology. *International journal of psychiatry in clinical practice*, *16*(4), 316-318. https://doi.org/10.3109/13651501.2012.693186  Starcevic, V., & Khazaal, Y. (2017). Relationships between behavioural addictions and psychiatric disorders: What is known and what is yet to be learned?. *Frontiers in psychiatry*, *8*, 53. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyt.2017.00053 Zac, A., Huang, Y. C., Von Moltke, A., Decker, C., & Ezrachi, A. (2025). Dark patterns and consumer vulnerability. *Behavioural Public Policy*, 1-50. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1017/bpp.2024.49