Warthogs

APRIL 8, 2024.

a lomba story from central africa mr warthog and mr lyon collected by clement doke one day mr lyon went hunting where he went he got caught by a string trap that people had set and there he struggled and struggled thinking to pull it out no he just tired himself out he suffered it was then that he became thin and emaciated and then only mere bones remained then one day mr warthog too and his children came in single file and they said let us go and look for food they came upon mr lyne in the trap he had suffered in it Then Mr.

Lion said, "'My dear Mr. Warthog, loosen me, your friend.

I'm in trouble.

I am dying.' Mr. Warthog said, "'All right,' and he loosened Mr.

Lion.

Mr. Warthog said, "'All right, let us be off, Mr. Lion.' Just as they were going away, Mr.

Lion turned and looked behind.

Yes, Timon and Pumbaa are the

Warthog meerkat, I

assume.

Is that

what it is? Warthog meerkat?

Yeah.

Is that what they're doing then? Is that the idea that Kevin Owens is supposed to be his Warthog meerkat?

And I was a young warthog.

Hurry.

He's like, go get a mojo instead of Warthog after Shaggy and a dog.

So it's mostly cats.

At least

I don't like it.

The average house cat, warthog, and grizzly bear are all faster than the fastest human sprinters of all time.

Warthog? House cat? House cats are fast.

They are?

Oh, my God.

Yeah, 100%.

The warthog? Warthog.

So that's what I'm thinking of.

I'm like, how did he not say hog? He went weasel? I was way off.

It's but it dated

Timon The fuck sakes Timon was played by Nathan Lane and he's very gay I What are you thinking? Warthog.

I'm going with straight.

Going with straight.

Yeah.

Let's do that.

I can see bisexual Warthog.

Yeah, yeah.

i am dying mr warthog said all right and he loosened mr lion mr warthog said all right let us be off mr lion just as they were going away mr lion turned and looked behind he saw the young warthogs coming along behind in a line trotting mr lion said friend what a crowd of children are yours friend give me one of your children to eat see how thin i have got with hunger where mr warthog was he said and you would eat a child of mine and it was i who loosened you to save you Mr. Lyons said, No, just give me one child of yours.

Let me eat.

Then where Mrs. Warthog was, she said, Listen, husband, we have listened upon ourselves a wild beast.

He is asking for a child from us.

Let us be weak towards him.

Then indeed they were weak towards him, saying, all right sir you will eat of them where we are going first sir let us return to that thing that caught you let us see what it is like let us look well at it he said indeed let us go my dependants you shall see what it is like that has tortured me thus and almost killed me indeed they went and reached the string they said but how did it catch you where was it then mr lion said it was like this just take hold of it and bend it down indeed mr warthog and his wife bent it down they said but how did it catch you in this way sir first try then indeed mr lion put his foot in ah mr warthog let go and caught mr lion then the warthogs and their children scattered then mr lion said oh my dear warthog are you going won't you undo me mr warthog and his wife said no and we your friends we who loosened you well and then you begged a child of ours to eat you are a beast remain now tis you yourself who can loosen yourself There where Mr.

Lion remained, he was tortured and tortured by the string, and then he died in it.

And so Mr. Warthog never meets Mr.

Sure.

Thank you Warthog.

Thank you Scott Parker.

Thank you Hayden.

All right, Gary just left, but let's finish opening these packs.

So this is the first one, Gratitude Gorilla, and then we got Well-Rounded Warthog.

Well, at least I ain't got 250.

[laughs]