Therapy

I'm curious as to what would happen to them if they began to believe that they didn't have to believe that.

Would everything fall apart? Is it a house of cards if you take that one out? Like, why is it that believing that a lesbian should be put through reparative therapy, why is it that that becomes so important to somebody that if they began to doubt that, that so much else would fall apart? Which makes me therefore think that there's something else happening rather than the obsession about the erotic life of a woman.

What's your relationship with prayer now-

Mm-hmm

... after it had been used to harm you in that way?

Yeah.

I mean, it, it was used to harm me, but I am very lucky that I've always loved the question of prayer, and in many ways even when I was going through reparative therapy and exorcisms and those terrible things, uh, there was always a, a safe place of, of prayer that didn't have to involve belief.

Prayer, to my mind, is entirely God optional.

So I will sit constantly and think through things, and so inside, I feel, too.

Now, at times I can be sinfully arrogant, no doubt, but I've thought, "No, no, no, no. I've done years of therapy as a client.

I've thought through this.

I'm pretty sure, based on experience at 64 years old, that this is probably what's going on." And then if someone's, like, doesn't see it, they have no self-awareness, inside often I'll sit there, and that's my own ...

I'll just give people the silent treatment, or I'll be, like, detached or withdrawn.

And then Lisa or Jim or somebody, Shay, Leah, will be like, "You okay? Is everything..." And then I'll be like, "Here's the full story." And so, um, yeah.

Can we have a quick therapy moment around that?

Mm-hmm.

I'm your host, Rachel Goffman.

I'm a doctor of physical therapy and pelvic pain coach.

After years of living with chronic pelvic pain and searching for answers in the traditional Western medical system, I finally found healing through a mind-body approach, and now I help others do the same.

Whether you're brand new to a mind-body approach to healing, or you've been at it for some time now, this podcast is here to support you on your healing journey.

A long-awaited license.

But a little bit about me.

I worked in physical therapy for years as a physical therapy aide specializing in prenatal, postnatal pelvic floor.

physical therapy.

And in the picture, the brain and the heart are holding hands.

Her sort of description of therapy is sometimes part of therapy is working out how we make our heart and our brain...

Work together.

Work together.

You can email us at jsamuelpod at gmail.com or DM my mum on Instagram at juliusannualmbe.

And just to say all messages are kept completely anonymous.

And as always, thank you for listening and for being part of our amazing therapy works community.

So what I didn't realize, I didn't think at the outset that this was an act of control, but it is.

I'm learning through therapy and, um, yeah, through therapy, is that my ...

I, I deal with my fear of rejection, um, by being an avoider of conflict.

Mm.

But it's like, no, they really might.

Yeah.

And you've described a real linear recipe theology or recipe therapy that says maybe the linear A plus B equals C if I do these things.

That's not a bad thought to have some linear thinking, but we're talking about control and letting that go and say, I still wanna show up as I can, as healthy as I can, and these other people get to show up as unhealthy as they can.