Teletext

Analog is the word.

I mean, he could only communicate with the UK using a thing called a Rockex machine, which was the wartime British equivalent of the Enigma, which was an amazingly cumbersome machine that you had to type on Teletext type and then convert it with three encryption systems and a one-time pad.

It took hours, and there were only two of these Rockex machines in existence, one in the basement of MI6 and one at the British Embassy in Tehran.

So he is on his own trying to sort of send this stuff back, which is why when he is presented with this incredible golden spying opportunity, his heart drops.

[laughs]

You know, like Teletext-

Yeah

... right, on the, on the TV.

No matter what happens in the transfer window, we will never have a story again like Roy Essendoh, who was signed from Ceefax.

For younger people watching, you used to hit a button on your television, and you got Ceefax or Teletext, and you used to put in, like, football was 301.

It was also how we booked our holidays.

Yes.

So they needed to find a striker who wasn't signed to another club and who wasn't cup-tied.

So somebody for some bizarre reason advertised it in Ceefax.

Now, I've been lucky enough to get the inside story of Roy Essendoh, who, even though it was Ceefax, they called him the Teletext Talisman, right?

[laughs]

My bumhole can do the Thomas Crossword, my bumhole beat Nicky Wire in a thumb war, my little toe is in fact Mark Lawrenson, I something the Eiffel Tower, well I can jump the Eiffel Tower on one leg.

There is a secret number that gives you Teletext porn and only me and three others know it.

I made Bamboozler from Teletext cry.

I hold the record for being the best moonwalker in Norfolk.

Well, I know someone in Norfolk who has a webbed face.

book holidays.

In fact, me and Vicky, that was our first holiday, was CFAX Teletext holidays.

Yeah.

And the face that they pulled, and they were like, what?

There's certain codecs involved.

There's certain protocols like 608, the TV protocol, DVB for Europe, Teletext.

There's WebVTT.

There's all kinds of things.

What we're seeing in preparation for the big video conference in Amsterdam, which is in September called IBC, there is now vendors streaming encoders that are supporting the new modern standard of subtitling.

DBT-TML is unlocking support for every language.

which is not like it used to be, right? All these broadcast standards like Teletext and the American 608 standard, there were so many limitations, right? You couldn't do Korean, you couldn't do Japanese, right? If I wanted to, I could tell Gemini to put emojis every time I say the word like sunny, right? Like a little smiley face sun and it will do it.

So it unlocks the potential of doing live subtitling for anyone in the world, right? You're in Mongolia, you're in Thailand, you just hit go.