Sensory processing sensitivity

That's just so life-changing.

And I can relate to that in my own version of learning what HSP is and learning that there's a book, multiple books, and just people who share in that experience.

And how that does flip things from...

Believing that we need to tone down our sensitivity to actually exploring what shifts in our environment and lifestyle can support us in being and enjoying our sensitivity.

There's something wrong with us.

Yeah.

I'd love to hear how you conceptualize, like, what is a highly sensitive nervous system? How do we know that this is what we're living in or looking at? And how is that different from a non-HSP nervous system?

Absolutely.

So when another person's emotion begins feeling more important than your own, even temporarily, then what happens is we tend to try to correct that in one of two ways.

We fight, which is generally not the HSP way, but we can get into arguments.

So yes, that is one way.

Or we comply.

What is so important to them? And if you do ask, then genuinely listen and find out what's going on.

A lot of times people's emotional reactions are coming from them wanting to be heard.

And so if you actually listen, which is one of our great traits as an HSP, you may start to find that their anger or their whatever emotion it is starts to soften because you're listening.

Now, listening doesn't mean that you're condoning.

So, so that like deep empathy and sensory awareness, um, can show up, um, And sometimes it can look a little bit like shyness too.

There are slightly more introverted HSPs than extroverted, but there can be extroverted HSPs as well.

So like that kind of hanging back and kind of like the pause to check is a very HSP thing for parents and kids.

Um, where we're just kind of like observing, like you walk into a room and you're kind of like, huh? Okay.

They're building a sense of self-efficacy.

Hooray, that's a win, right? What can happen, and especially not to throw non-HSP parents under the bus, but when a parent doesn't recognize that their kid's not trying to be like willfully disobedient or like, just like rude and like disobedient and mean, they'll be like, why don't you go run around with all these new kids in this completely new situation? Like I think of like Chuck E.

Cheese or like Dave and Buster's like torture for a lot of HSPs.

And the parents like, go, go, come on, come on.

This is Optimal Relationships Daily.

10 Things You Should Know About Being in a Relationship with an HSP, Part 2 by Lisa Petruzzellis of highlysensitiverefuse.com.

Number 5, HSPs are sensitive to and responsive to touch.

Clothing tags and itchy fabrics may drive them mad.

For Valentine's Day, think suede and silk.

HSPs want nothing but soft fabrics and you next to their skin.

Their beds can't be too hard or too soft.

Just like the princess and the pea, they want what they want, and they know when it's right.

This is Optimal Relationships Daily.

10 Things You Should Know About Being in a Relationship with an HSP.

Part 1 by Lisa Petsinis of HighlySensitiveRefuge.com. HSPs are highly lovable, not high maintenance.

As unique individuals, we all approach dating and relationships with different personalities, preferences, backgrounds, and ways of doing things.

Sometimes we're even wired differently.

Frankly, it's hard to understand what being highly sensitive means when you're not the one experiencing it.

This fact can make relationships a little tricky for you at times.

Dr. Aaron's data also shows that approximately 34% of love relationships involve at least one highly sensitive person, with the HSP usually being the unhappy one of the pair.

to support highly sensitive parents and parents of highly sensitive children through highly sensitive parenthood, which is worldwide.

And Amy is a highly sensitive person herself.

So she gets it personally and professionally, which is super, super important.

She is also a mother of two highly energetic young children.

Thanks so much, Heather.

I'm really excited to be here and to continue our conversation.

So if you could just talk a little bit about how you found out that you yourself was a highly sensitive person, was that before you started doing your HSP work or after?

Okay.

That's like an Irish way to deal with it, but it's not very effective therapeutically.

So, you know, and I, I saw this great documentary that Alanis Morissette did called Highly Sensitive Person, and, and I really related to some of it.

And, you know, my therapist has been saying that, and, "Oh, you're an empath." I'm like, "Eh." I, I'm just wired for...

I like search for the people who are in harm's way and then try to help them.

I wanna help people learn not to be afraid, and that we have power in numbers, and that together we can hopefully stop this, you know, avalanche that has started.

And, um, if we don't stop it now, and if he gets away with closing the elections, which you know he's trying to do, we're doomed.

And I don't like to say that, I, I don't like to feel that, but I'm a realist as well as a highly sensitive person.

You were talking about empathy earlier and just-

Hello, hello, and welcome back to Overstimulated and Over It, the podcast for women in Perry with ADHD who have been told they are too sensitive, too emotional, too intense, too reactive, and and just too much and are now realizing maybe the world has just been too loud this whole time.

I'm Blair Pfeiffer, ADHD and perimenopause coach, licensed mental health therapist, certified sex therapist, fellow ADHD human right here with you and card carrying highly sensitive person.

Today's episode is going to be a little bit more personal because we're talking about being a highly sensitive person, also known as HSP.

And what happens when that finely tuned nervous system meets ADHD and perimenopause.

So a little spoiler alert.

It can feel like your nervous system is wearing a super scratchy wool sweater while standing under bright fluorescent lights, probably in a Walmart, and listening to someone chew really loudly while music is blasting like it's Abercrombie from 1995.

So fun.

I first learned about the term highly sensitive person several years ago.

By the end of this episode, you'll understand what actually makes someone a highly sensitive person, and why high sensitivity is about much more than simply feeling things deeply.

In this episode, you'll discover why highly sensitive people often feel different from those around them, even when they can't explain why.

what four underlying traits researchers discovered that make being an HSP much more than simply feeling emotions deeply, and how understanding those traits can begin replacing self-doubt with greater self-compassion.

They don't just notice that they're different.

They start judging themselves for being different.

For many people, the term highly sensitive person or HSP, which is the short version of it, creates a picture of someone who is emotional or easily hurt or quick to cry.

That's the kind of connotation in the world of what sensitivity is.

And while emotions are certainly a part of high sensitivity, that's not actually how the researchers define this trait of being a highly sensitive person, or as they call it, sensory processing sensitivity.