Ross W. Greene
American psychologist and authorWikipedia
23
MENTIONS
14
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12
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Search complete. 23 mentions across 14 episodes found for "Ross W. Greene".
Oct 30, 2026
Susan HopkinsGUEST
Like, don't, you're not trying to get him to stop doing that.
Susan HopkinsGUEST
You're trying to understand, well, why is he doing that? Where's that need? And what did I, back to the Ross Green idea of you're late, which is new and I love that.
Susan HopkinsGUEST
It's like, okay, what did I miss a couple hours ago? They walked in through the door and you already knew it was going to be a day, right? We've all felt that.
Kassie AllisonHOST
Right.
Rebecca ResnikGUEST
But for a lot of these kids, it is much more about the context than anything that we would say like, oh, this kid has this particular defect.
Rebecca ResnikGUEST
And so when you had Ross Green on, for example, he talked a lot about how we have to be curious because frustration is just like a stomachache.
Rebecca ResnikGUEST
You could have a million different things going on to explain that particular set of things that you're able to see on the outside.
Rebecca ResnikGUEST
But as soon as you get curious and not curious in terms of like, oh, I wonder if a sticker chart would work.
Diane BachmanHOST
And the written apology really seems to work well.
Diane BachmanHOST
But I think, like you said, Andrew, just being able to model what that looks like, you know, like you said, old school, it would just be, you know, if Johnny came and smacked me in the face and And the teacher's like bringing him over to apologize.
Diane BachmanHOST
I'm sorry.
Diane BachmanHOST
And then he runs away.
10 MINS LATER
Andrew SmithGUEST
Yeah.
Andrew SmithGUEST
Sounds good.
Andrew SmithGUEST
Can you go with that, Johnny? And then, you know, so sometimes the solution for it is like blows my mind that like some of our hardest kids come up with some amazing solutions.
Andrew SmithGUEST
Right.
Kim MooreHOST
So what do we do? Well, the change starts with what we believe about why children struggle.
Kim MooreHOST
Dr. Ross Green, founder of Lives in the Balance, puts it in five words.
Kim MooreHOST
Kids do well if they can.
Kim MooreHOST
His work points to lagging skills such as flexibility, frustration tolerance, and problem-solving.
Ginny YurichHOST
Yes.
Ginny YurichHOST
I remember I read a book by I think Dr. Ross Green and he was talking about how, you know, it's like the kids that get suspended are always the kids that get suspended.
Ginny YurichHOST
He's like, it's not working.
Ginny YurichHOST
It's never worked.
ScafiHOST
yeah that's fascinating so what what how do you overcome that what do you do how do you do you change your interpretation of it like how do you deal with that situation
Maria AndreoliGUEST
i think i think understanding first you know before you can even change your interpretation perhaps you need a new insight into the different reasons children may do what they do there's a quote I like by a clinician called Ross Green and it says kids do well if they can right and I think that applies to so many different contexts but that child could be for in that example of constantly trying to get you know your attention when you're on the phone when you're talking to someone instead of viewing children's behavior as misbehavior, we can view it as this child is lacking certain skills.
Maria AndreoliGUEST
There may be certain skills that this kid needs, and this specific child may be lacking the skill of waiting for their turn, lacking that ability to, oh, when I want a parent's attention, I have to stop and wait.
Maria AndreoliGUEST
And if I view it in that way, it's like, okay, my mindset changes.
Giselle ShardlowHOST
I love that so much.
Giselle ShardlowHOST
That was my favorite Ross Green.
Giselle ShardlowHOST
You know, I see you're having a hard time.
Giselle ShardlowHOST
That was the best advice.
JewlzHOST
Yeah.
Scotti WeintraubGUEST
And this is Dr. Ross Green, who I recommend everybody read because I think he's so smart.
Scotti WeintraubGUEST
But it's this idea that what we see on the surface is really just literally the surface, that there's something else going on underneath it.
Scotti WeintraubGUEST
So some people describe it like an iceberg.
MaryhanHOST
So instead, the shift here is away from building habits through expectation and toward building habits through collaboration and low demand invitations.
MaryhanHOST
So Ross Green's collaborative problem solving approach in which the child is a partner.
MaryhanHOST
Yeah, we partner with them.
MaryhanHOST
We have this more adult to adult conversation in figuring out how something might work and rather than the subject of an instruction.
Yehudis SmithGUEST
Amazing.
Yehudis SmithGUEST
So Dr. Ross Greene has a statement that I think is incredibly powerful.
Yehudis SmithGUEST
So I'm gonna read it twice, okay? I'm gonna read it twice.
Yehudis SmithGUEST
Here it goes the first time.
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