Yep.

So whether I'm the one who's shutting him down or whether he's the one that's shutting me down, if we can seek first to understand, that's gonna help us stay out of fights.

Yeah, convincing is not a very good communication strategy unless you happen to be on a debate team.

But most people who are married are not on opposing sides of a debate team, even though it feels that way sometimes.

So rather than starting with let me convince you or let me explain to you how you should see it, let me understand how you see it first.

I think it took me a few years to figure out that there isn't a right and a wrong way to see everything, and that my way of seeing things wasn't necessarily always the right way.

That would be one of those really great things to teach in college and high school.

[laughs] Okay.