[applause]

That's how to live the Christian life.

And so we've gotta make sure this is for- foremost in forming who we are.

Amen? We're gonna read Philippians chapter three, and the letter's written by Paul, and he's already been...

he's visited Philippi, uh, and he's started this church that he's now writing back to.

We can read in real time live, um, in Acts chapter 16.

Paul visited, visits Philippi, this city, and, uh, a few encounters that start the church there, and one of them is with a businesswoman called Lydia, and, uh, a moment with her transforms her life, transforms the purpose of her business and the reason she's there in this, what, Philippi, a small but significant business city, a commercial place, and transforms her life.

[laughs]

Yeah

... and the mass of America, and, and, and in, and in Russia and other European countries where, where they basically they didn't pay athletes, but they went into the army, but they didn't...

They weren't really in the army, they just trained, so they had professional setups.

So after '96 Olympics, it changed, and I went in '96 after those Olympics to train in Germany, and I trained with a guy called Dirk Lange.

Now, Dirk was a German swimmer that used to swim.

He'd retired, and he coached his girlfriend, Sandra Völker.

And I went over there with them 'cause I was just intrigued to see, A, the way she looked and h- how good she suddenly...

Can you just, uh, uh, sort of talk about that a tiny bit if it's not too controversial?

But it turned out to be quite, uh, long-lasting, Catherine.

It was.

It...

Yeah, Catherine was, Catherine was great.

So, Catherine is...

I was, at the time, I was with Vincent for 20 years.

I met Vincent at 21 till I was, uh, till I was 40.

Mm.

I'm going to look it away.

So I was in my...

They became my stepsisters.

I was at my stepsisters' house, who weren't my stepsisters at the time.

But there was two of them, and there was my two sisters, and we were in a room, and we were watching Doctor No.

I didn't know this because I had to research, because I couldn't remember what movie it was.

But Sean Connery came out of the water in a pair of trunks.

What did finally give you that psychological safety?

For more information, visit audaciouschurch.com.

And thank God the World Cup is over.

And tonight, apparently there's some exhibition match on tonight.

So if you wanna come back to tonight's friendly, we are gonna watch it.

And they're just playing off for something insignificant, but bless them in the name of Jesus.

Any Argentinians in the room or Spanish? Give us a wave.

You can make your way out the door right now.

It's

Yeah.

Uh, and they, and they, and they loved her and looked after her, and I think that the, the beauty for that, for me, was an element of Mum's kids were everything.

She would never, you know, because of her experience, she's never gonna give her kids up.

Not that many people give their kids up, by the way.

Um, but she was also, when I did come out to my mum, which was at 24, I remember speaking to her.

I told my sister first, my younger sister first, and I think the thing is we always build these things up in our head to be worst-case scenario.

We're always thinking what may go wrong, as opposed to actually what the positive outcome might be, and my sister was awesome, and, and what did I expect? I didn't know.

Mm.

That must be hard mentally.

Yeah, and I didn't think it was.

I still don't think it was that bad.

As I say, not a torture soul, but I got very good at the act, so to speak.

So some of it is, I mean, it's not just about being gay, but about a double life.

But people sometimes say, you know, when they go to...

I've got a very good friend of mine that's very high up in the Premier League and she's like, I've got imposter syndrome.

A terrifying time it must have been when you decided to tell everyone.

In wr- in writing the book, is, do you think, "Well, I understand why I, I, I, I d- I didn't come out," or, "I wonder why I didn't come out?" What questions have you asked yourself?

Kind of a little bit of everything really, in a sense.

But it was at a diff- You know, I, I was born in 1970, so late...

When did I know something? Early '80s probably, but late '70s or mid-'70s, all I heard in the playground, in the changing room, at school, in the news was being gay is not okay, right? From, from, from what was said, to the piss-taking, to, to, to see- things you see visually.

And as a child, those things are really powerful.

So when I, when I kind of thought I might be gay, I, I mean, the first thing I said was in, in front of my sisters and my stepsisters, uh, I was watching Dr.

No, and Sean Connery came out the, the, the, the sea in a, this scene, uh, and I said something.

You had a pretend girlfriend who was your mate's wife.

What you got for us?

I mean, I've been fortunate enough because what I did within sport, I met a lot of different people, a lot of different musicians.

Became friends with Heather Small.

I mentioned that in the book.

Misha Paris, Tony Hadley played in his golf day a couple of times.

I mean, new romantic stuff was a big thing.

Spandau Ballet, Duran Duran, ABC.

It's in your head, isn't it? Yeah.

So why now? Why your autobiography

now? Good question.

It's called My Double Life.

And I think a lot of people, whether, you know, I mean, my story of my double life was, you know, it was about being gay.

But there's lots of things to be in your double life.

The sort of the face you put on at work.

the stuff that you decide to show people, tell people, you know, I think a lot of the time people are putting a mask on in different circumstances, whether that be the workspace, whether it be out with your friends, whether it be, I don't know what it is, you know, and I'm not saying everyone's got it and they're not, it's not all about your sexuality.

I mean, how did you feel when you'd done it publicly? You must have felt good, right?

But how rewarding is that work to honor that generation each and every day with what you do?

It really is.

You know, when I started, it was, you know, about high-performance airplanes.

You know, it was about, you know, P-51 Mustangs and all that.

I was a kid in high school.

Well, I want to go fast and fly and eat airplanes.

And then I got to meet the people who flew them.

That's really funny.