Lori Gottlieb

i'm empowered um you know and the rest is sort of you remember that droopy dog cartoon that would hold up the sign that said i'm happy but it was like a basset hound so it looked really being miserable but you know i was like i'm empowered 99 of me was just like i i would there are a million other things i would rather do with this money

i have a question i want to go too off script um Did you read Lori Gottlieb's previous big book from 2009, maybe, Marry Him?

I remember the discourse on it.

It sounded so annoying that I did not read it.

she marry someone that she settled for and get divorced or something? Nope.

Again, this is why the discourse cannot be trusted.

No, Lori Gottlieb might as well be you.

Mm-hmm.

And that's, as a journalist and researcher, kind of my most labor-intensive and also interesting work, asking people what their experience has been.

And also, talking to their therapists or psychologists or others who sort of study the space and see sorry what they're hearing and I remember one interview that I did that I found really resonant it was with a therapist who works Often she's based in New York City.

She works with like often sort of really successful men, women, but mostly men.

And she talked about the number of clients she has, this number has increased, who are great at dating, which is to say they can find someone, match with someone, sleep with someone almost every night if they want to, and often do.

And then they come to her feeling kind of confused as to why they still feel kind of lonely and unfulfilled.

and as she talks to them she talks about realizing and in some cases helping them realize that what they're looking for when they want to like spend the night with or you know end the night with someone is often not the sex but they want to be near another person like it's not that they want to get off it's that they want company And they haven't quite made the leap from understanding that the one is not the same as the other.

And she and other psychologists and therapists that I've talked to know that this is a real repeating pattern that they're like only seeing increase.

And I mean, I talked to both my peers and others, and there is, I think, just an increasing realization among broad groups that this moment is unsatisfying.

I want to help people to live differently.

Psychotherapist Lori Gottlieb was trained to help people navigate the hardest moments in their lives.

But just a few years into building her practice, she faced a personal crisis.

And suddenly, Lori realized that maybe she was the one who needed to rewrite her story.

I feel like my biggest takeaway is that the consumer has definitely changed.

And I felt like it was validating to hear, especially from Dr. Justin Garcia and Dr. Amir Levine and Dr. Lori Gottlieb, hearing them speak at the Global Love Institute conference and talking about their insights,

I

was just like, oh my gosh, we have to change our entire onboarding system of how we educate our clients to be and our matches on how to have a really great first date that leads to a second