And so looking back, what did that experience teach you about grieving the life you thought you would have and like the version that you really expected to become?

So I want to say the main thing that it told me and then circle back to a conversation that gave me that insight.

What it told me is grief for all of us is a process, right? It's not a defined 72 hours, three weeks of casseroles, and we're done and we keep going with life like the experience didn't happen.

We're grieving our body changing.

We're grieving relational changes.

So for me specifically, as you said, because I lost my sight over a period of time, that's what told me, Grief is not, number one, is not linear.

And number two, it's not confined in a box.

uh and then you still make action so i think that this is such an interesting recipe for those at home that are listening and are going through changes it's okay to acknowledge them

And I

still can't adequately put words to the depths of that grief.

And what got me through was one short conversation with a mentor that I have to share.

And that's exactly what I want to give every single person today who's listening.

A mentor of mine in college, and this was an academic advisor.

So this wasn't counseling.

This wasn't specifically about grief.

You know, I

The

way that I all started the adaptation, as you referred to, was the support around me.

So in and I only share that to say.

I want to empower others and encourage others when we go through change and difficulty and adversity that we're not expecting, that is uncertain, that's overwhelming.

Leaning on our support system is how we navigate forward.

And that's not being a victim.

That's not being weak.

But

And love explained

by that.

Yes.

because I had sight for so long, I definitely had that visual map.

Like for me, the beach nature is my deep connection.

So yes, I can visualize myself standing on the beach, walking on the beach, looking at the ocean, the sunrise, the sunset.

that sort of thing.

But what is the gratitude component of? If anyone going gratitude, what do you mean gratitude? Let's define

[chuckles]

And inside I'm thinking, "Okay, that is horrible, terrible advice." Only in my stubbornness, I was determined to prove her wrong.

I was determined to say, "This is not good advice.

I'm grieving.

I'm depressed.

I'm anxious.

Let me show you I have nothing to be grateful for." So the one day became three days.

But, you know, for somebody listening, you know, what are some practical things that can be done today when, you know, the future's not looking so bright? It is looking frightful.

What did those experiences teach you about your capabilities?

Completely different aspects of restoring my confidence and identity.

That's a perfect question to what you just asked, and we did not plan that.

So what Arizona State taught me was it taught me what I needed, and it taught me it was okay to be comfortable in my own skin.

So being one of the largest universities in the country, There were probably 10 people on campus with guide dogs.

I mean, there were 100, I don't know how many people on campus with physical disabilities.

So all of a sudden, I wasn't the only blind person.

no.

[laughs]

All the crazy questions.

So her reaction totally surprised me.

So I walked in the room and walked up to her bed, and she was like, "Are you totally blind?" And I was like, "Yeah, I have very limited light perception.

I can't see anything.

Yeah, I'm total." And she said, "Okay, then I'll have a conversation with you and tell you everything." So by this point, I'm very shocked, like, okay, this is way throwing me off, and I have no clue how to respond to this.

Never had that reaction before.

Mm-hmm.

So so when you are up and people are asking you to speak, what what do you go and how do you go about it?

So what I've trademarked is experiencing grit and gratitude.

And what I talk about is when we're navigating through change, how do we use those tools of grit and how do we use the tools of gratitude to empower us forward? So I'll give an example from my life and I define grit by not just that push on, push through, sweep under the rug, you know, be strong, get over it.

But the grit of just perseverance when it's really, really hard.

Right.

Like acknowledging it's really, really hard and still choosing to move forward, even when it's hard, not waiting until the anxiety is over, not waiting until the change is over.

So I'll give an example, practical example from my own life, example of grit.

major takeaway is in the midst of change, whether it's

What would be a good bridge to that for someone who is sincerely trying to understand and also to communicate respectfully, sensitively with someone who is different?

Ask questions.

Ask questions about the other person's experience and ask in a way, in a tone that it's obvious you genuinely care, not in like a defensive, like you've done wrong.

And so I'm asking you all these questions, right? But in a calm, I genuinely care about you and your life experiences.

So just asking basic general questions.

And that bridges, that starts the conversation.

And then you realize, oh, well, they're human.

Tell us more about that.

Mm-hmm.

Because I had such incredible support, I was then able to accept and receive that grit for myself and that gratitude and say, "Okay." What is my purpose? What is my gifts in this world? So I wanted to be that support system to others.

I was deeply passionate about being that support to others in the world.

So through the organization, I do speaking to organizations, corporations, associations, and I also do one-on-one coaching.

So again, the goal is to speak to organizations that are going through a specific change that's major that they need support, how do I navigate through this change? And so I tailor it very specifically to the change they're going through and talk about how they can use grit and how they can use gratitude to navigate through so the change doesn't just overwhelm them, shut them down.

At the same time, I, the coaching is on an individual level, yet we're doing the same process, taking their specific change that they're going through and saying, "Okay, how do they need to apply grit? How do they need to apply gratitude in their life?" So, and again, the whole passion was to be that support system to others as I had received.

[laughs]

"... to have this title." The reason I did is because, so I have had two black lab guide dogs.

And I know it gave the listeners a little bit about your background, but can you tell us a little more about your story and how it shaped the work you do today?

100% of the work I do is only because of my life experience.

I definitely would not be doing this work had it not been for the, just the way life happened and unfolded.

So as you shared in my bio, at the age of nine, I was diagnosed with an extremely rare eye disease called Yet the difficult part was there was no timeline.

There was no guidance of you will lose your sight at this point or in so many years, you will lose your sight.

So it was a complete unknown.

You've got this rare retinal disease, but you might be 40 when you go blind.

you said, look on the bright side, right? That

I need as a child.

And they would do things, just small things like, okay, yeah, you can still play basketball.

It's still safe.

You still have enough vision.

It's still safe.

When it gets unsafe, clearly, when you're losing sight, We'll pull you out.

But as long as we know it's safe, you can keep doing this.

Right.

Thank you.

So it was a major part of my mindset healing from the anxiety, from the depression, and even now today, it is a major, major, major part of my mindset perspective.

And I would love to share how it all, how the gratitude started.

I did not just wake up one day and say, "Okay, I'm grateful to be blind.

This is wonderful.

I recommend it to everyone.

[laughs] Let's just be grateful." The way that the gratitude started was a mentor of mine in, late in those, in the high school years, came to me and said, "Laura, I want you to start writing down every day three things that you're grateful for." And again, in my Southernness, thankfully, I smiled and said, "Okay." In my head, I was thinking, "You are a horrible mentor.

So what advice would you give to someone who's currently experiencing a life-changing transition?

What was that whole process like from when you're in denial, recognizing this is a lifelong thing, to now where you are using it to help other people?

So it was 100% the support around me.

So the whole time that my mindset is I can't, I don't have the strength, I'm living in constant panic attacks.

And when I say that, I don't mean like a panic attack once a year.

I'm talking like several throughout the day, every

day.

So as I'm feeling this and experiencing this and thinking this, It was only the support around me that kept me going and allowed me to move forward to where I am today.

I think like, look at what's right in front of you and do what you can right now and do what you can.