So how did you do that, and how do you help other people do that?

I've gone through midlife crisis myself, and when I go through them you really don't know 'cause you're not really looking closely at yourself 'cause it's hard to see yourself, right? So you can't really analyze yourself to say, "Oh, I'm in a midlife crisis." But then I have people who say, "Yeah, this is a midlife crisis.

Get over it." And they're making the switch, whatever the switch is.

So what I'm doing is I'm teaching myself what I think.

I'm teaching myself what I believe.

I'm thinking what's admirable, what's better, right? 'Cause even though I had nice parents, I had that core addictive personality of gambling and alcohol.

As a side note, my mother and my father privately would pull me aside, and my mother would say, "You know, if your father didn't gamble, we'd have more money." And then my father would pull me aside, "You know, if your mother didn't drink, we would have more money." [laughs] So when they told that, it's like, oh, I guess they're canceling out gambling and drinking, and literally that's what happened.

So you started then to see the good, to look for the good that came from your growing up, and then what did you do with it in order to heal your marriage?

it affect other areas of your life beyond your marriage?

So my story is a story of marriage.

But lots of people have stories that are not just marriage related.

Their troubles come from growing up in difficult homes.

Their troubles come from the difficult things that they have in life.

So my difficulty came because my childhood was troubled.

And what I did is I married a girl from a troubled home.

What helped you move from feeling powerless to taking ownership of your life?