Conflict management style

Yeah.

Well, maybe, maybe I'll start by just talking about conflict styles because I think what you're talking about is, has something to do with this.

In the book, you know, there's all these chapters.

One is called Patience Is For Amateurs, where we kind of deconstruct what we call the trance of nice, which is kind of endemic in Buddhist communities, this c- sense that if I were really practicing, I'm gonna be patient all the time, and I'm gonna be calm all the time, and be receptive and generous and loving all the time.

That, that's not the ground that we are working from.

We're working from the ground of where you actually are, what you actually feel.

So when we detonate [chuckles] the trance of nice and, and connect with what's real, what's actually happening for you, then you start to see there's maybe three different conflict styles.

The first in the book we call volcanoes.