Codependency
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Search complete. 12 mentions across 11 episodes found for "Codependency".
Sep 6, 2026
SamHOST
Hey there, welcome back to 7-Minute Books.
SamHOST
I'm Sam, and today we're wading into something that feels really personal, Facing Codependence by Pia Melody.
SamHOST
Sophie, I have to admit, when I first picked this up, I thought codependence was just about needy people in relationships.
SamHOST
But this book blew that wide open.
SophieHOST
On control, not freedom.
SophieHOST
And she ties that into addiction too.
SophieHOST
Codependence and addiction often go hand in hand.
SamHOST
Whether it's addiction to substances, behaviors, or even the relationship itself.
Sam LehokoGUEST
Right? The most broken of people.
JacquesHOST
Codependency.
JacquesHOST
What do they call it?
Sam LehokoGUEST
Yeah, codependency.
Angela PughHOST
And before we keep going, I want to make a quick distinction too between people-pleasing and codependency because there can be a lot of overlap there.
Angela PughHOST
People-pleasing is primarily a pattern of prioritizing other people's approval, wants, or emotional comfort over your own.
Angela PughHOST
Codependency tends to be a larger relationship dynamic.
Angela PughHOST
That's where you can start feeling responsible for another person's life, their choices, problems, consequences, emotions, sobriety, or functioning.
Angela PughHOST
You're fixing, rescuing, managing, over-functioning, trying to control outcomes.
Jodi WhiteGUEST
And so if there were A simpler definition of love addiction, I would say always look at these three symptoms of love addiction, which these are Pia Melody's symptoms.
Jodi WhiteGUEST
She wrote the book Facing Love Addiction and also Facing Codependence.
Jodi WhiteGUEST
But the symptoms are seeking that or expecting even that unconditional positive regard from another adult in our adult relationships.
Jodi WhiteGUEST
And the second is that we assign too much value to that person that we're trying to get that unconditional love from.
Terri ColeHOST
And I wrote another whole book on boundaries called boundary boss, that these are very much connected.
Terri ColeHOST
And the same thing with my second book, High Function and Codependency, also very much connected to women with father wounds.
Terri ColeHOST
So part of what we want to make a distinction about today is you've got to know What is yours to carry? And when you have disordered boundaries, a lot of times we feel overly responsible for other people and how they feel and what they want.
Terri ColeHOST
So part of our goal is to learn that we don't need to over-explain, right? We don't need to convince someone else that we have a right to have a boundary.
Jeffrey CombsGUEST
So if you don't understand, you'll just keep recreating the same situation to fulfill the same set of feelings.
Jeffrey CombsGUEST
So 12 steps would be the 12 step program of AA, OA, uh, Codependent, CoDA.
Jeffrey CombsGUEST
I mean, it's a, it's a w- curriculum that's huge for the recovery community, but very few people ever really practice the steps.
Jeffrey CombsGUEST
The w- the steps are a guideline, and it's just one way to stay sober.
speaker_0ADVERTISER
We just like to do everything together.
LizHOST
And sorry if you're a person who actually knows about psychology and you were just cringing listening to me say that, because here is the actual definition of codependent from psychology today.
LizHOST
Codependent describes a relationship where one person sacrifices their own needs to fix, save, or support another person.
LizHOST
Their self-worth relies entirely on pleasing or taking care of that partner, often enabling unhealthy behaviors like addiction or poor mental health in the process.
LizHOST
I don't think that that describes us.
Morgan AndersonHOST
When you're, when you're independent, hyperindependent, "I don't need you.
Morgan AndersonHOST
I'm not going to rely on you." Codependence is, "I can't function without you.
Morgan AndersonHOST
Your mood becomes my mood.
Morgan AndersonHOST
Your day becomes my day." There's that merging of two people.
David Deane HaskellGUEST
Those kinds of things can really kill you fast.
David Deane HaskellGUEST
And these other Codependency can kill you too.
David Deane HaskellGUEST
I certainly felt despondent enough and almost, you know, really ready to end it because I was just so, so unwell and unhealthy even after quitting drinking and I was like sober for years, but I still like felt miserable every day because that was still dragging me down.
David Deane HaskellGUEST
So, I mean, it can kill you, but certainly these kinds of things you can address over time.
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