Betty Martin

Yeah.

So have you heard of the Wheel of Consent by Dr. Betty Martin?

Yes, but tell the listeners all about it.

Yeah.

And that's one of the things.

You know, Betty Martin says in The Wheel of Consent that people often say they don't know what or that they have trouble receiving.

What she says is it's not that we have trouble receiving.

It's that what we are receiving is not what we actually want.

It's like really having permission that you move yourself through those stages and you see how it feels where you are.

And usually we've done quite a bit of work with Wheel of Consent, Betty Martin's Wheel of Consent, which is an incredible tool.

offering to the world and framework and she has lots of free material online that people can experiment with if you're listening right now and you want like a really simple way to transform your relationship with what you desire and what your role is sexually that's a great starting point so then once we get there oftentimes I mean a lot of what happens is not what people think is going to happen so you might have a concept of yourself and in any direction and then get there.

And all of a sudden it's like, you're enjoying something you didn't think you would enjoy.

And hopefully we are surrounded by lovers who are part of that dance and are also doing their own practice.

There's a concept that I like to teach a lot called the wheel of consent by Betty Martin.

And It basically talks about the fact that we live on these specific spectrums when it comes to sharing our sexuality.

Really any kind of relationship, not just inside of sex, but just follow me on this path.

So these are two questions that I work with with clients.

They are originally taken from the work of Betty Martin, who was the founder of the Wheel of Consent work.

And I really love the simplicity of just introducing these two questions.

So without further ado, let's talk about this.

One thing that's worked well for my clients in the past, and it's not the actual conversation that they're having in front of me, but it's kind of using this thing, and we've talked about it in the past too, the wheel of consent.

There's actually something called the three-wheel minute of consent game, which is a book written by Betty Martin.

And it really helps people because then you're talking about, The giver, I mean, to break it down in a simplistic manner, sorry, but the giver and the receiver, right? So someone is asking for what they, how they want to be touched.

And then the other person has to decide, like, is it okay for them to touch them in that way, right? And if not, then they choose something else, right? So it's just something and you're just doing they're just doing this game in front of me just with their arms and their hands.

And then I tell them to take it into the bedroom where they can be naked if they want to and try it there and in a more vulnerable state without me.

And I ask them later how it goes.

So, yeah, Betty Martin, Wheel of Consent.

She's such a goddess.

I just want to move on for a moment.

raise your hands on the screen if you are familiar with the teachings of Betty Martin, popularly known as the Wheel of Consent.

So the Wheel of Consent is a really beautiful teaching tool, very easy to find.

And the way that I've sort of internalized it and parsed it out for myself is There are four ways of engaging touch and engaging our experience of touch.