Bard

There are a number of different types of elves you can play in this game, but the Elves of Linden are the elves of the west coast of Eriador, there with the Grey Havens and everything.

And then there are people of Bree and the Bardings.

The Bardings are the humans that are kind of from the area around the Lonely Mountain.

You know, Bard the Bowman, his people, you know, the town and the lake.

Oh, yeah.

Bilbo and the dwarves finally had a way into the mountain, and Bilbo snuck in and stole a cup.

And if we use that date as the guide, then on October 23rd, Bilbo once again entered the Lonely Mountain, spoke with Smaug, who in a fury then left the mountain, destroyed the hidden door trapping the dwarves and Bilbo within, and then flew to Esgaroth, which he burned before being slain by Bard the Bowman, descendant of Girion, Lord of Dale.

And in 3018 on the 23rd, Elrond finally found the Shard of the Morgul Blade after three days attempting to heal Frodo.

And on October the 24th, at 10 o'clock in the morning, if you want to know, Frodo awakes in the house of Elrond where he is greeted by Gandalf.

What payment? I gave you nothing.

Bard is like,

We have this.

gonna freak out dude

Once finished by Philip Mitchell, The Hobbit was an adventure that did have illustrated locations from the book, and some characters, all the dwarves were replaced by just Thorin, and you, as Bilbo, sort of followed the events of the book, solving both object puzzles and puzzles where you had to direct non-player characters to do something.

But players will tell you that no two games of The Hobbit are the same, walkthroughs will tell you the intended path and the solutions to the puzzles, followed by a notice that it might not happen this way, and even the official hints will tell you that, say, Bard the Bowman has an 80% chance of hitting the dragon in the end, and the other 20 are split evenly between the gang getting another try and dying instantly.

Because The Hobbit is a simulation.

Just because you're taking the right action doesn't mean it's guaranteed to succeed.

They can get killed in those too, including Smaug, the final boss of sorts.

Oh, and when you tell a character to do something, they may refuse.

Famously, Bard may say no when you tell him to shoot Smaug, and then you die.

Oh, and if you take too long with your input, the game's clock advances automatically.

... largely their...

Which I feel like was largely their reaction to Luke Evans' Gaston and Luke Evans' Bard the Bowman.

Yeah.

Like...

Mm.

So they were big.

So they announced, you know, Tom Cruise is The Mummy, and then there was gonna be Javier Bardem's Frankenstein, Dwayne Johnson as The Wolf Man.

Okay.

Appreciate you, man.

John, how are you, man? "I need love to go full Bard to Bowman and eliminate Smaug, like AKA DaBears." I like this.

Look, a, a Hobbit reference.

You know, there are plenty of places for you to get your Packers content, and I'm sure they're talking X's and O's, and they're breaking down the film, and they're talking about the Bears', you know, scheme and whatever's happening in the game.