This show gives me a reason to live.

I have anxiety and, and also depression.

I got them both, so boom, boom, you know? Um, I am white, uh, fully, you can see.

I'm full white.

Anxiety is a white disease.

That's ours.

I don't think brown people are allowed to have it.

Yo.

Yeah.

But he was directing it, and, um, it was me and Ed Helms, and I got nervous 'cause I respect both of them.

And I'm supposed to smack his hand, and I kept smacking his hand with the wrong hand.

And John kind of, you know, uh, bluntly was like, "Stop fucking it up," in a nice way.

Bet.

The day we found out that you and the whole crew was at Hit Factory, the mission was to get me to go to the gate, start freestyling, and see if I could get in the studio.

I'm rapping, and then suddenly I hear a voice, "Hey, open the gate.

L- let him in." The gate slowly went, "Cun-cun-cun-cun-cun-cun." They all there watching this, and they watch me walk into there, and that is a moment that I will remember for the rest of my life.

Mm, hypocritical

... isn't that bad and hypocritical of saying like, "Say whatever, it's your comedy special.

We want comedy to be free." But then they didn't, because then when I said what was an obvious- This is Michael Rapaport, and my podcast, the I Am Rapaport Stereo Podcast, is unlike any one you've ever heard.

We're a variety show, and if you're looking for strong opinions, funny opinions about sports, entertainment, politics, pop culture, and whatever else catches my attention, then subscribe now.

This kid, Jaafar Jackson, is as good as Rami Malek as Freddie Mercury, and it's as good as Timothee Chalamet as Bob Dylan.

And I say that with love and respect for both of those actors.

And I don't know how many Oscar nominations they give out, I don't know if it's five, six for best actor, 150% this kid, Jaafar Jackson, should absolutely, positively get nominated for his portrayal as Michael Jackson.

And go, "Smell the race."

Have you ever had a tinge of the feeling?

No. Yeah, I mean, like, you know, people get mad at you for stuff.

People p- you know, yell at you on the internet, but you kind of, you kind of quiet it all down.

I mean, I, I...

There's nothing really you can do.

I think the more, the more fans you amass and the more popularity you create, people are...

You're gonna have people that don't like it.

I can't pull it back

So you're telling me he's that good? He's that good, dude?

Yes, I am, dude.

I think Dax is, I think Dax is self-aware, but also this is a, this is who he is, and he doesn't feel like...

It's also why he would tell you the business he kinda got out of the mainstream acting, he didn't enjoy that, that...

He didn't enjoy it the way he enjoys making his own stuff.

The way that we all love YouTube and making our own shit 'cause no one says, "Don't do that.

Can't do that."

You can make more money on your, on your-

We're gonna keep it right here.

Dude, there's a couple people here that are having literally no fun.

It's funny to see some people's faces that are too high.

This guy, now we smile, but look at how fucking high this fucking guy is.

He's so fucking nervous about what's happening.

He's got the hoodie up, tied real tight.

Have you been that high before, Andrew? As high as that guy? Yeah.

Do you guys mind if I read a couple fan questions? Yes.

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I still don't, Ca- Gavin.

That is a good move.

I got one more good move.

A buddy, a buddy was talking to me, um, about his single days, about his, his favorite move in New York.

This is pretty good.

I was like, "What was your favorite move before you got married?" He goes, "I would do this thing.

I'd be at a nightclub or a bar or whatever, and I would notice the girl that I, the pretty girl that I'm, like, looking for." And he goes, "I would wait until she makes eye contact.

And no matter what man was around her, like in any vicinity, I'd go, 'Boyfriend?' I'd mouth boyfriend." And he goes, "Their reaction is the dead giveaway of whether it's okay to engage or no." 'Cause if they go, "Yeah, it's like, you know, it's my boyfriend," like that, "Okay, close it down."

Uh-huh.

For sure.

Irish Catholic girls do like athletes.

For my friends that hate golf, I always say, for people at home that are bored about golf and anything, when somebody goes, "Well, why do you like golf?" I love the outdoors, and I want an activity.

I'm a busybody.

So you get to hang with your friends and do a little fun activity, and I'm a big, like, a big bar game guy.

Like, I love darts, I love pool, I lo- I love shuffleboard, and this is like that.

It's like just a fun little quirky activity that you get to do outside.

Mm.

Okay, be naked with your

kids.

I've never eaten cat poop.

Any last words before I get you out of here?

I think the human condition is so vulnerable in particular, and we're all kind of rushing through life as fast as we can, and it's very sad and scary and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

Can you, uh, can you take me through your last month of viewing experiences with the Chicago Bears? Like, just, let's make up for lost time on what you would've been analyzing as our Bears correspondent if you'd been doing your job.

Well, [chuckles] if I wasn't getting paid by other entities and not getting paid by you, and I was here, uh...

Well, I- the, the loss, uh, the loss to the Lions, uh, the week prior was devastating, particularly because, you know, I, I think we're significantly better- a better team.

And, you know, them stomping us, uh, weeks before was also terrible.

And losing to San Francisco, you know, didn't feel good, uh, at all, and I'm not a fan of Brock Purdy.

I don't like his dances.

Not a big fan of the dancing.

Uh, among the things that you're doing, Andrew, what is it that you enjoy the most?

Yeah.

You know, we don't really see each other like that.

You know? Like, we don't...

When I see another red head- There was a red-headed girl yesterday working this event that we were at, and she was like, "My brother..." And I said, "Let's take it easy 'cause-"

Yeah.

"...

I don't know if you're an enemy or a friend yet." You know, a regular person I meet on the street, "Hey, how you doing?" Another red head, I go, "I'd like to see the resume first-"

Were you just like, were you saying jokes or were you just, like, talking about anything?

We just, I knew I wanted to do a comedy podcast, like, about...

The whole impetus of my show of Whiskey Ginger was, and still is, I mean, but it's just a lot of people are sober now, was we would have a cocktail whiskey.

We'd have, we'd have a drink and we'd talk about the very first time you got wasted.

You know, like the very first time, and what was that like when you were a kid.

Like, what was the first time that you...You know, 'cause I started the show telling a story, like the first time I got wasted with my buddy Matt.

I'll never for- and we stole, you know, a bottle from his old man and got fucking hammered, threw up everywhere and it, I was like, everyone has these stories of the first chunks of times that they got hammered and how they stole it from an uncle at a holiday party, blacked out, threw up, you know.

MSG it isn't.

How did you get involved in this? How'd you get involved?

You know, h- honestly, uh, one of our producers on Bad Friends, his mother and father both work for Special Olympics in Minnesota, and I was like, "Oh, I kinda wanna do something with you guys." And then a good friend of mine who I've known for years, uh, started working for Special Olympics Southern California and it was kind of kismet.

I was like, "Dude, let's do something." And it was just...

The universe kinda dropped it in my lap a little bit.

Um, it was kind of a, a beautiful coincidence in the universe.

And then he said, "Let's do this if we can this year and every year." I said, "Let's make this the first of many." So, it, it...

The universe gave it to me.

You know?

Shit on SNL, yeah.

...

the bullshit narrative.

It's such a bullshit narrative of like, "They're too this, too that, too that, too..." Dude, they, uh, you're o- They only say that because...

SNL is built f- You know when SNL is at its best? When it's built for its audience, and its audience is usually younger than you.

So when you're like, "I don't like these sketches," it's like because it's not for you.

(laughs) No.

And then sometimes off camera, we'll do bits.

Like, will they still continue to use actors? What will they do?

I don't know, man.

The more...

I talked to a guy literally yesterday who creates, um...

He has a company that does, uh, um, simulators for golf, right? And he was talking to me about the simulation technology that they use for golf.

And then he's like, "Eventually, you may not even have to need to go play the course.

We will have everything feel, hear, smell...

Did you feel like it was?

[laughs]

Especially 'cause you're in such good shape.

I like that you're like, [cymbals crash] "Fuck these fat girls, man." That's cool.

Yeah.

Fuck them, dude.

Right on.

Good for you, dude.

Trust us.

Yes.

I'm gonna say this one thing about the Kimmel thing, and then I'm done, because I didn't finish kind of my thought before, but I like Jimmy.

I texted him just to check in with him 'cause I, I, I've always liked him.

He's always been pretty cool to me.

Also, my buddy was like, "How crazy, you're like one of the last guests on Kimmel." I did it, like, a week before he got dropped (laughs).

I was like, "Oh, that'll be cool.

That'll fucking end, end my career of late night with his canceled show." But I, I like the dude a lot.

They must.

How often are you getting out there? You getting out there a lot or what?

If I have- if I, like, if I had an- an hour or two after this I can sneak out and play nine before I have to go shoot something else.

(laughs)

It's hard to do a full 18, but I can sneak out and play holes.

I mean, I- it- it gets harder and harder as I get busier, but-

... yeah, it just peels off.

Thankfully, I'm like half Italian, so I will get a little color, more than a normal ging, but no, dude, getting jacked, I'm out.

I- look, I'm at a stage in my career, I'd like to say...

I don't know who said this, but it made me laugh so hard, because they said, "This is the evolution arc for people in Hollywood," right? Is, it starts off with, i- in reference to like me, it'd go, "Who the fuck is Andrew Santino? Who is that?" And then the second one is, "Ooh, I like that guy, Andrew Santino.

Get me Andrew Santino." And then the third one is, "Get me someone just like Andrew Santino."

Uh, all right, so when your special comes out, do you then go on tour? Is that kinda suck to be like-

I'm gonna do some new dates.

I'm doing dates.

... guy coming from a wrestling background.

Yeah, you know, it's funny because that movie got pitched around for like, I think it was like 10 or 12 years, and different people were gonna do it, and it kind of came and went.

No one figured out how they think they could do it.

And Pete Farrelly, you know, had told me that he got John Cena to do it, and I was like, "I wonder if, is that gonna be something that Cena could do?" I mean, genuinely.

And honestly, he's like, "Wait till you see what he brings to the table," because they already kind of did some test stuff with him.

And e- on day one I knew right away, I was like, "Oh man, he's got it in the bag." I mean, he, John's a brilliant dude.

He's like intelligent and, and, and sweet and funny and cool.

When you're filming these, uh, like TV shows and movies, how much, uh, ad libbing do you get to do? Like, do you get to do multiple takes where you can just fire off a bunch of jokes? And how involved are you in kind of that process in your scenes? Like, is it anywhere similar to your process when you're creating, like, a standup special, or is it completely different?

Your favorite Dave scene that you were in, that you ad libbed in that one, what is that?

Uh, I think one of my favorites that sticks out, uh, was the, uh, (laughs) 'cause it was kinda true to life, was, um, the, the, the neighbor who, uh, whose dog continues to poop, uh, on my, uh, uh, throw poop in my trash can.

Uh, this was kinda like such a real thing for me.

There's a guy whose dog pees on my, on my front, on my front gate, and, um-

Yes.

You know, that I, and, and also, like, we had a conversation about there was a scene where I'm asked if I have kids, and I lie, and I make up this whole thing that I do have kids to, to this guy because, uh, he feels like a father figure, and I don't have kids.

And I have been put in that situation when someone's like, "You have kids." And I don't, I'm like, "Oh, n- no, no, no." And they're like, "No, you don't?" And then a piece of me wants to just go, "Yeah, I have seven kids.

Se- I have seven or eight kids, uh, spread all over the country." I do kinda wanna inflate it.

You're just gonna feed your golfing addiction.

Yeah.

Well, look.

I went on tour for two years with Bobby Lee, so I had to stare, uh, at Bobby Lee in his underwear for two years on a tour bus, so I think I'm owed a little bit from the universe for giving this love of, uh, comedy, uh, around the world.

And so after two years of touring and I shot my special that's gonna come out, uh, on Hulu in September, uh, with Peyton Manning's company, Omaha Productions, shout out to them, um, I wanted to take some time, and I had pitched this golf show.

I said, "You know, I wanna do this one hole walk and talk with celebrities, athletes, golfers, uh, called No Bad Lies." And, uh, I give them deliberately bad lies, and all the while, they tell me a time where life gave them a bad lie and how they recovered.

Um, and, uh, it was, it was, uh, praised by many people in the business.

How do you navigate this particular labyrinth of, yeah, golf, money, business, fun, friends with celebrities, and the world's burning, and Hollywood's burning, and it's kind of infuriating?

(laughs) NOS gauntlet.

Oh.

(laughing)

(laughing)

Only have to guess, two.

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Yeah

... was on the train in Chicago, and he hears these two dudes are on the tr- on the subway, and the one guy's like, uh, "Hey, yo." And he recognizes his friend.

He goes, "Oh, what's up, man?" He goes, "Hey, man, whatever happened to Charles?" Or whatever the guy's name was.

He goes, "Whatever happened to Charles?" He goes, "Oh, man.

Charles is dead, man." And the guy goes, "Oh, shit.