Admiration

I voted for James Tallarico for the U.S. Senate.

My vote motivated by two things, deep concern about Ken Paxton's record and genuine anxiety Admiration for the character and principles I see in James Tallarico.

All right, it's the latter part there.

I don't believe this is actually going to help James Tallarico.

And being with you here together in community is certainly a wonderful addition to that.

I want to start a tiny little series that I'm calling Admiration, Appreciation, and Loving Awareness.

Today I want to focus on this idea of admiration, which is not, I've never heard anyone lead a meditation practice on admiration.

And I'll tell you where the idea came from for me specifically around this word is I've had a number of conversations, sort of vulnerable conversations with friends lately about the trap of comparison.

"'I

do not attempt to deny,' said she, "'that I think very highly of him, that I greatly esteem, that I like him.' Marianne here burst forth with indignation— "'Esteem him! Like him! Cold-hearted Eleanor! Oh, worse than cold-hearted! Ashamed of being otherwise! Use those words again, and I will leave the room this moment.' Eleanor could not help laughing.

"'Excuse me,' said she, "'and be assured that I meant no offence to you by speaking in so quiet a way of my own feelings.' Believe them to be stronger than I have declared.

Believe them, in short, to be such as his merit, and the suspicion, the hope of his affection for me may warrant, without imprudence or folly.

It's attention that confirms the particular story a person needs to believe about themselves.

For someone invested in being brilliant, Admiration for their intelligence may provide that confirmation.

For someone invested in being the indispensable helper, being told that nobody could manage without them, that might do it.

The second person, the your good helper person, might offer real help.

Different responses support different images.

The point is to understand what the response might confirm without assuming that every person who sees attention has the same need.

Admiration can bring relief without changing the rule that made it necessary.

Suppose someone feels acceptable only while others regard them as exceptional.